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Spiritual Health Books For My Girls

Todd Bowman and purposeful Living Series

These posts are designed to model a system of purposeful living. At least once a month, Todd spends time setting meaningful goals around one of seventeen core priorities.

If you missed it, consider reading the foundation post – Purposeful Living #1.

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Correct Priority #5 – Social Health- Immediate Family-Children (Spiritual Health)

Goal Set – November 2012

Goal:

Develop a detailed family spiritual plan to better ground my three girls in God’s word. Specific elements of this plan include the items listed below.

Develop a plan to help each girl identify Christian books to read.

Goal Status

Completed

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Thoughts – Updated

The week after Christmas I rounded up the entire family and we drove to Omaha to Parables Christian Bookstore. It is a nice store and they have a large selection of Bibles and books.

I tasked each of my girls to find one book to purchase. My only stipulation is that had to be a book that would spur their spiritual growth.

Amy & I walked them through the different parts of the store and helped them identify sections and types of books they might like. After looking around for a while they all made great book selections.

Teagan selected the book Live To Give by Austin Gutwein. It is biography of a teenager who turned a love and passion for basketball into a non-profit organization with 40,000 members and has raised over $3 million for AIDS relief in Africa. I love that Teagan’s faith is active. Her love for God inspires her to make a difference in the lives of others.

Colsie chose the book From Blah to Awe: Shaking Up A Boring Faith by Jenna Lucado. It is a non-fiction book written for teen girls. It talks about how to have a vibrant and radical faith while navigating the challenges of middle school and high school. Colsie just entered sixth grade and is learning how to navigate challenges that didn’t exist in elementary school.

My little Avery was more ambitious. She picked a book called The Secret Power of Joy. It is a FaithGirlz Bible Study on the book of Philippians. While it is written for children it is a pretty intense Bible Study involving reading Bible passages and then answering a set of questions based on what was ready. Avery seems pretty excited about it, but I wouldn’t be surprised if she needs some help getting through it. I will monitor her progress and work through it with her if she needs extra motivation.

{Looking for books and hanging out at Parables}

{Love my girls}

{Money well spent}

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Thoughts – (previous post that spurred on this November Goal)

I spent a great deal of time over the past year planning our family Florida vacation. This planning paid off with an amazing trip. It may have been the best two weeks of my life.

But in the process of planning this vacation I neglected many other things, including being a good parent. I have been convicted since returning from out trip that I need to dedicate more time and do a better job in a variety of areas that are far more important that vacation.

One area in which I know I need to improve is being the spiritual leader of our home and doing what I can to better ground my girls in their faith. Each time they step out of our home they enter a world where many despise the gospel of Jesus Christ. They enter a world that is hostile to God’s word.

When my children our older they will have to decide for themselves what they believe. But there is zero chance I will stay silent while they are bombarded with messages contrary to what God wants for them every day of their life.

My first responsibility is to model for them what it means to live a Godly life and be sensitive to His will. My next responsibility is to make sure they know what is true and right. I will not ignore either of these responsibilities.

Amy’s Thoughts –

I think back on this fun family day trip to Omaha with fondness. We ate out at 5 Guys (Todd’s fav) and hit up my fav (Starbucks) on the way home! I was really proud of the choices my girls made in books. I love the pic of Todd holding up his purchases with a twinkle in his eye…we both know it is investment that will not return void.

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Foundation Post

Build Your To-Do List Around Correct Priorities – Purposeful Living #1

Outline Of All Purposeful Living Posts

Purposeful Living Outline

FAMILY

Family Devotions – Purposeful Living

These posts written by Todd (Amy’s husband) are designed to model a system of purposeful living. At least once a month, he spends time setting meaningful goals around one of seventeen core priorities.

If you missed it, consider reading the foundation post:

Purposeful Living #1

Build Your To-Do List Around Correct Priorities

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Correct Priority #5 – Social Health- Immediate Family-Children (Spiritual Health)

(click here for outline of Correct Priorities)

Goal -November 2012

Develop a detailed family spiritual plan to better ground my three girls in God’s word. Specific elements of this plan include the items listed below.

Identify appropriate Bible study materials for a once-a-week family Bible study time.

Thoughts
I have developed a family Bible study plan (the topic of a future post), but am suspending that plan for the time being to do something else.

The History Channel is broadcasting a ten-hour miniseries called the Bible. The Bible is produced by Mark Burnett and covers Genesis to Revelation in one grand narrative. Whether you have watched this miniseries or not, my guess is that you have probably heard of it. It has generated blockbuster ratings for the History Channel.

I decided that for now the Bible miniseries would become our weekly family Bible study. Each week we are identifying a night when everyone is home and watching one hour together as a family.

So far we have watched episode 1 (hours 1-2) focusing on Abraham and Moses. We all know these Bible stories, but were still blown away seeing these stories come alive in such a dramatic way. The production value is high and acting is strong. We stop the DVR occasionally to discuss the broader
themes and details of the stories. It has been a fun and rewarding time for our family.

Thoughts – (From Previous Posts)

I spent a great deal of time over the past year planning our family Florida vacation. This planning paid off with an amazing trip. It may have been the best two weeks of my life.

But in the process of planning this vacation I neglected many other things, including being a good parent. I have been convicted since returning from out trip that I need to dedicate more time and

do a better job in a variety of areas that are far more important that vacation.

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Amy’s Thoughts:

It has been precious family time to watch this series together. Usually I get annoyed when we have to pause a show. With this show, I look forward to the questions and discussions, and pushing pause.

I love how it takes all the Bible stories we have been reading to our girls since they were young and brings them to reality. It is a series that is very well done and I look forward to our weekly family time.

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Today’s Purposeful Living

Family Devotions Part 1

Goal Setting & Reflection

February 2013

Foundation Post

Purposeful Living #1

Build Your To-Do List Around Correct Priorities

Outline Of All Purposeful Living Posts

Purposeful Living Outline

FAMILY

Correct Priorities- My Spiritual Health, My Children’s Spiritual Health & My Children’s Physical Health

Goal setting and reflection with Todd Bowman

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Goal Setting & Reflection-March 2013 – Purposeful Living

Correct Priority #1 – Spiritual Health

(click here for outline of Correct Priorities)

Goal – March 2013

Create space for a half-day or full-day personal spiritual renewal retreat once a quarter (every three months). Find a place that is quiet and without distraction and pray through my entire list of Correct Priorities, seeking God’s guidance in every area of my life.

Thoughts

I have been feeling off lately. I have been fairly faithful and consistent in some of the goals I have set for myself, but still felt off. It’s hard to explain. It is just a feeling like I was doing something wrong – doing the wrong things – moving in the wrong direction.

It reached a point today where I felt I needed to get out of the house and go somewhere quiet and pray. I brought my Correct Priorities Journal with me to pray through as well.

I ended up at Burger King. I bought a $1 fountain drink and spent the next 2 hours praying, reflecting, and seeking God’s will in every one of my Correct Priorities. God showed up and brought clarity and focus to how I should be spending my time.

I added new goals, revised others, and reprioritized which goals were most important. While I had been engaging in meaningful activity, I had not been engaging in the right activities. I am excited now to start moving in new directions.

I realized today that it is not enough to just pick out one priority a week and do a bit of goal setting and reflection. It is necessary, but not enough. It is also necessary to occasionally review all of them in a single sitting.

I am going to start with once a quarter. This seems like a reasonable time frame to start with. Any more often would take too much time away from my family. But it seems often enough to be able to refocus if I’m getting off track.

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Correct Priority #5 – Children (Spiritual Health)

Goal – March 2013

Continue to grow spiritually in specific areas of my life in order to become a better role model to my children. These specific areas are listed below.

Kindness – Even when disciplining my children, it has to be done with a heart of kindness.
Prayer – Look for opportunities every day to lead my family in prayer.
Compassion – Openness to new opportunities to be in relationship with and serve those in need.
Priorities – Set aside the pressures of life and be fully engaged in the areas where my family most needs me.
Faith & Humility – Dealing with my children in a manner that is firm, but also recognizes that I cannot control the hearts of my children. That is God’s job.

Thoughts

My girls, especially my older ones, have been struggling in a few areas of life. I mostly blame myself. I was not as engaged as a parent in these areas as I should have been when they were young. During their most formative years I not only often ignored these issues, but also modeled wrong behavior.

Over the past few months I have become more active as a parent. And in many areas Amy & I have seen significant growth and change in our girls. They have responded well and are growing in the areas we have focused on.

But there are also some strongholds in each of their lives that are proving challenging. We see what we think are breakthroughs only to see the same behaviors coming back a day later. Three steps forward. Two steps back. Over and over again.

During my quiet time today I really prayed over my girls and asked God how I could be a better parent. And I found Him telling me (a feeling – not a voice) that the major issue now was not doing something different, but becoming different. I needed to continue to change, to grow, to become a better person. They need to see the change in me that I want to see in them.

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Correct Priority #5 – Children (Physical Health)

Goal – March 2013

Assist my daughter Colsie in daily completing her physical therapy to strengthen and repair the damage in her knee.

Thoughts

I purchased several volleyball training videos and had planned to use this time right now to work with my middle daughter Colsie on developing her volleyball skills to prepare for playing on a team this spring.

Instead she was diagnosed with a severe knee injury which will prevent her from playing sports of any kind for some time.

Since this diagnosis I tend to forget about it most nights. I depend on Colsie to find the motivation on her own to put in the work to get better. Reviewing my Correct Priorities list today I felt I needed to be much more active in motivating and working with her in strengthening her knee. I can transfer the time I was going to spend with her on volleyball to helping her get better.

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Amy’s Thoughts:

First of all, have to say I feel like the luckiest lady in the world. To have a man who will discern when things are not ‘right’, turn Burger King into church, and seek the Lord for direction– what a beautiful gift to call him MINE.

I have always thought of my Todd as a humble, gentle and compassionate person, especially when it came to parenting…especially compared to ME! So to hear him say he wants to grow in these areas and to watch that growth take place is really cool. I’ve seen a gentle & calm spirit in him lately while interacting with our girls. I’ve seen the change and it is VERY attractive. 😉

Here is the kicker. I got chills when I read what Todd said above… “I needed to continue to change, to grow, to become a better person. They need to see the change in me that I want to see in them.” Just this morning, before I read this post that he wrote, I was on my way home from dropping my 2 oldest off to school. The amount of drama that happened in that 30 second car ride to school (just 3 blocks!) was enough to make me lose my temper. As I was driving home, I was quite exasperated and cried out to God in my thoughts “Lord, what the heck? When will I ever see change in my girls & why is this so hard lately?” Quickly in my spirit I felt Him say back, three VERY CLEAR words. “YOU MUST CHANGE.” I immediately felt conviction and agreed. I need to change in my attitude toward them when they are not behaving how I would like them to.

God is so good to be teaching us the same things. May He be ever so close as we chose to obey Him!

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Goal Setting & Reflection-March 2013 – Purposeful Living

Foundation Post

Build Your To-Do List Around Correct Priorities – Purposeful Living #1

Outline Of All Purposeful Living Posts

Purposeful Living Outline

FAMILY/ Marriage

Correct Priorities – Serving Your Spouse

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Correct Priority #4 – Social Health-Spouse

(click here for outline of Correct Priorities)

Goal – February 2013

Show love to my wife through a purposeful act of service. Specifically this means taking full responsibility for upkeep of the basement. Areas of focus include:

Making sure it is always picked up.

Vacuuming once a week.

Getting rid of the NordicTrack exercise equipment that is broken and hasn’t been used in years.

Getting rid of our old big screen TV taking up space in the back corner of the basement.

Getting rid of my copy machine taking up space in the back corner of the basement.

Organizing the back corner of the basement currently filled with various random items.

Thoughts

Our home is important to Amy. She works very hard at making our house a home where our family and others feel comfortable, peaceful, and content.

And she has done a darn good job. I love being at home. Our girls love being at home. We are all home bodies. And a primary reason we love being home is the comfortable atmosphere Amy has worked so hard to create.

I know it drives Amy crazy to walk down the stairs and see my stuff strewn all over the basement table and floor. In thirty seconds I can turn the space she worked so hard to organize into a disaster area.

So it is time for me to step up and take responsibility for keeping the basement picked up. I spend the most time there. I have turned the basement into my personal man-cave.

I know I’m not up to tackling this project all at once so I broke it into several smaller goals that are more achievable.

I’m also not committing yet to a specific starting date. At this point I am only committing this goal to paper. But committing it to paper is a significant step as it will greet me each week until I act on it.

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Amy’s Thoughts:

“I felt so touched reading this post. I noticed the basement had been looking very picked up the last few weeks. I also would feel almost giddy when I would hear the vacuum in the basement running, knowing my man was vacuuming (there is NOTHING like a man who vacuums!). To know he has more goals set in the area of serving me as his wife makes me feel very loved and thankful. It also motivates me to check myself and think about how it is that I am purposefully serving him.”

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Purposeful Living

Goal Setting & Reflection-February 2013

Foundation Post

Build Your To-Do List Around Correct Priorities – Purposeful Living #1

Outline Of All Purposeful Living Posts

Purposeful Living Outline

FAMILY

Helping My Daughter Grow Her Business-Part 1 – Purposeful Living

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These posts written by Todd (Amy’s husband) are designed to model a system of purposeful living. At least once a month, he spends time setting meaningful goals around one of seventeen core priorities.

If you missed it, consider reading the foundation post – Purposeful Living #1.

………………..

Correct Priority
Priority #5 – Social Health – Immediate Family–Children

Goal Setting & Reflection Date
November 2012

Goal
Help Teagan (my 13 year old) deepen her knowledge about how to effectively run a business.

Identify a small business book that we can read and discuss together.

Goal Status
In Progress

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{My Teagan didn’t want to get her new shoes muddy}

Thoughts – ORIGINAL
Teagan desires to continue growing her Twisted Tape business. Amy has done a great job helping Teagan with the mechanics of starting this business. Teagan has asked me to help her grow in her understanding of how to run an effective business.

I am definitely not an expert in business and/or sales. But I am a learner and know how to go about deepening my knowledge of subject matter I am interested in.

I am going to first help Teagan by finding an appropriate book for us to read and discuss. Whether the book is related to growing a business or more specific to being an effective salesperson, I want to find something that will be of genuine help to her to support her in this project.

Thoughts – UPDATED

I have identified three books to read and discuss with my daughter to help her grow her Twisted Tape business.

The first book is The $100 Startup by Chris Buillebeau. This is a book focused on the necessary elements to start and grow a small business. I chose this book because we already had it in our home library and I didn’t have to spend any money to purchase it. I think it is important Teagan view this project as a business rather than just a “how can I get more sales on Etsy” endeavor. We will read this book first.

The second book is The Sales Bible by Jeffrey Gittomer. I browsed through every sales book at Barnes & Noble and liked this one the most. In addition to approaching Twisted Tape as a business, I also want Teagan to learn the art of the selling. I believe her business will depend on her ability to effectively sell her product. We will read this book second.

The third book is The Handmade Marketplace by Kari Chapin. This book outlines how to sell handmade products locally, globally, and on-line. Exploring in more depth the various ways to sell handmade items seems appropriate. We will read this book third.

What I am not interested in, at least not right now, is a book specifically about how to sell products on Etsy. I am not convinced this is the best way to sell her products. If it becomes evident after reading the books above that Etsy is a legitimate tool to market her products, we can further explore Etsy at that time.

My plan is to read a couple chapters a month. When I finish a chapter I will share with Teagan what I learned in the evening when we talk before bed. When I complete a book, I will compile the information and use it to work with Teagan on a business plan.

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Foundation Post
Build Your To-Do List Around Correct Priorities – Purposeful Living #1

Outline Of All Purposeful Living Posts
Purposeful Living Outline

Books/ FAMILY

Three Books To Strengthen My Marriage 2013-Part 1

If you missed it, consider reading the foundation post – Purposeful Living #1.

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Correct Priority

Priority #4 – Social Health – Immediate Family–Spouse

Goal Setting & Reflection Date
December 2012

Goal
Invest in the social and emotional health and strengthen my marriage by reading and discussing two books with Amy in 2013. The first book must be a mutually agreed upon marriage book. The second book may be any book of Amy’s choice. Specific goals include:

Mutually choose a marriage book.
Amy chooses a book of her choice.
Decide how often to read and discuss each book.
Develop a plan to ensure relevant discussion and dialogue.

Goal Status
Partially Completed

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Thoughts – UPDATED
Amy & I have identified the books we will read together and discuss in 2013. The goal was to select two books, but we ended up choosing three.

Love and Respect by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs

{Love & Respect by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs}

The marriage book we will read is Love & Respect by Dr. Emmerson Eggerichs. I don’t know much about the book, but Amy has friends who recommended it and she liked the parts she came across while browsing through it.

We also chose two additional books to read together both on the subject of nutrition. Both are written by Dr. Fuhrman.

Dr. Fuhrman is a board certified family physician, best-selling author, and nutritional researcher who specializes in preventing and reversing disease through nutritional and natural methods. He is the father (creator) of nutritarian eating. A key component of nutritarian eating is the Health Longevity Equation which he also created.

H (Health) = N (Nutrients) / C (Calories)

The first nutrition book we chose to read is Eat To Live. This is the first book Dr. Fuhrman wrote and I wanted to start at the beginning to understand the foundational theory and evidence behind his approach to nutrition.

The second nutrition book we chose is Super Immunity. This is Dr. Fuhrman’s most recent book and focuses on foods that offer the most nutritional benefit according to his Health Longevity Equation.

The first book provides theory and evidence on why nutritarian eating is the most effective way to eat. The second book provides clear advice on the most healthy foods.

We will read and discuss one chapter each week. On weeks we go on a date we will discuss the book over dinner at a restaurant or coffee shop. On weeks we stay home we will discuss the book on a Friday or Saturday night before we start a movie. We will both highlight parts of the books we consider important and want to share or discuss.

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Thoughts – ORIGINAL
This goal has become a yearly tradition and one that has proven to be very beneficial to our marriage.

Strong marriages don’t just happen by accident. They need to be nurtured through commitment and sacrifice.

Reading a marriage book together is an opportunity to prioritize our marriage. It will allow us to focus on what is important to keep our marriage strong. Reading a second book of Amy’s choice is an opportunity to enter Amy’s world. It is an opportunity to learn what is important to her and show her I care about the details of her life.

In future posts I will share the books we chose and some things I learned from each selection.

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Foundation Post
Build Your To-Do List Around Correct Priorities – Purposeful Living #1

Outline Of All Purposeful Living Posts
Purposeful Living Outline

FAMILY/ Kids/Family

Goal Setting & Reflection – January 2013 – Purposeful Living Series

Goal Setting & Reflection-January 2013 – Purposeful Living

If you missed it, consider reading the foundation post – Purposeful Living #1.

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Correct Priority #5 – Social Health – Immediate Family–Children (Emotional Health)
Goal – January 2013
Support my daughter Colsie in her desire to become a strong volleyball player and join a volleyball team. Specific things I can do include the items listed below.

Research and purchase an effective youth volleyball instructional video.

Thoroughly review the video and develop a volleyball skill development program for Colsie.

Thoughts
My sixth grade daughter recently communicated a desire to play volleyball. She has never expressed an interest in sports before, but she assured me this is a genuine interest. She has been hitting a ball around a lot at school with friends during recess and really enjoys it.

Volleyball is a huge sport in Nebraska with large numbers of children playing from a very young age. Even playing in a youth recreation league Colsie will be way behind without some help.

My plan is to assist Colsie in the same way I have assisted my other two daughters – Teagan (basketball) and Avery (soccer) – in the sports they play. I will find quality instructional material, learn the game, and teach Colsie how to play volleyball. Specifically I am interested in teaching Colsie proper technique, not just the rules of the game.

I understand the rules of volleyball, but I don’t know the first thing about volleyball technique. I don’t know the proper way to set, bump, serve, or pass a volleyball.

But I can learn. The key is finding quality instructional material. There are many resources, but most of it is junk. I will find as many websites as I can that sell instructional material, identify DVD’s that focus on technique, read the descriptions and reviews, and then make a purchase.

It was so much easier when it was just Avery playing soccer. Supporting three girls in their athletic endeavors takes a considerable amount of time.

But it is a fun way for me to participate in their lives. And athletics are a fantastic way to build resiliency in children.

It is worth my time.

Correct Priority #5 – Social Health – Immediate Family–Children (Social Health)

Goal – January 2013
Provide ongoing encouragement of healthy friendships for all of our girls. Provide support wherever appropriate and possible. Specific items are listed below.

Discuss with Amy the possibility of allowing our girls the opportunity to invite friends over and spend the night more often.

Discuss with Amy the idea of turning our basement into a teen hangout area.

Consider additional ideas to help our girls build healthy and positive friendships.

Thoughts
Encouraging healthy relationships for all of our girls is a huge priority to me and one that never ends. It has become even more important as they enter the teen years. It is a routine topic of discussion with Amy during dates.

Children and teens who surround themselves with positive influences are far more likely to make healthy choices. Children and teens who surround themselves with negative influences are far more likely to make destructive choices.

I can’t choose friends for my girls. But there are many things Amy and I can do to nudge them in the right direction.

Two of my girls have close friends who do not live in our neighborhood and do not attend the same school. Allowing them to come and spend the night on a regular basis would allow them to spend more time with these friends than they are currently able.

Turning our basement into a teen hangout area would better ensure that as our girls enter middle school and high school that everyone will want to hang out at our house. Having everyone at our house improves our ability as parents to positively influence their activities.

Either/both of these ideas would place additional demands Amy and myself. These are items I want to thoroughly discuss with her and get her input.

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Outline Of All Purposeful Living Posts

Purposeful Living Series

Related Posts

Goal Setting & Reflection

November 2012

December 2012

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