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Cancer Journey/ HEALTH/ Love/ Spiritual

She Is Thankful In Cancer

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I have a friend I want you all to meet. I have never met her in person, but consider her a dear friend.  We ‘met’ through her brother, who introduced us via Facebook when I was going through treatment for cancer.  He knew I needed to know his sister.  She is a miracle survivor, living with stage 4 breast cancer. Her cancer metastasized to her bones & brain, but her tumors are staying stable and ‘quiet.’

She is truly a miracle, but she knows that her status could change at any time.

She knows pain, both physical and emotional.  While her cancer stayed quiet, she watched her brother-in-law suffer with a reoccurrence of brain cancer, and was there for his family as he battled long & hard, and her faith never wavered.  I wrote a bit about his life here.

Michelle is one of the most courageous people I know. She lives her life in the moment & knows what it means to be thankful.  Her words encouraged me many times during my fight, and they continue to do so.  She updated her Caring Bridge site this week, and what she had to say just blew me away.  I knew I had to share it with you all, as it was such a tangible example of what Thanksgiving is all about.

{The Mellinger Family}
It is an honor to introduce you to my friend, Michelle Mellinger:
THANKSGIVING:
We are celebrating one of my favorite holidays of the whole year on Thursday.  It causes me to be sentimental, family-oriented, and most of all thankful.  I wanted to share why I am THANKFUL FOR CANCER.  Yes, that is hard to say, but so very true when I look back over the last three years.  
Cancer has given me HOPE:  Many people find that hope and cancer don’t go hand in hand.  But without hope cancer is debilitating.  Without hope, you spend your days wallowing in the how and why’s and spend little time enjoying the sights and sounds around you.  Hope does not mean that I am in denial about what is to come, hope is the empowerment to know that whatever is to come I can handle it.
Cancer has given me COMPASSION:  Before my diagnosis, I really didn’t SEE those around me.  Cancer has given me the ability to look into someones eyes and feel their pain.  It is given me empathy and a desire to want to help and encourage people.
Cancer has given me a FUTURE:  most people immediately think that cancer takes away your future.  I used to believe that too.  I used to live in the moment, not worrying about what was ahead for my life.  I didn’t use to dream about my future or what God had in store for me.  Now my future is tomorrow, next week, next month, next year.  I am investing in today so that my future will live on through my children. 
Cancer restored my RELATIONSHIP with my Savior:  I had a hard time BC (before cancer) wanting to spend time with Jesus.  I didn’t have a passion to be in the Word or kneeling in prayer.  I had it under control.  My life was going exactly how I had planned.  I had a great job, awesome husband, and two beautiful children.  But it didn’t go as planned, my life wasn’t unfolding the way I had envisioned.  I have found that God had a new plan.  I don’t always like the new plan, but I am trusting in Him to show me what it is that He wants me to do with my life.
Cancer has shown me that MIRACLES do exist:  I am a miracle!  It is not of my doing.  It is God’s doing.  I used to think miracles only happened in Bible times, but they still happen today.  If you looked at my medical records they would show a woman that had six months to live.  They would cause some doctors to throw their hands up and say there is not much we can do.  My God has allowed the medical treatments at the hands of my doctors and nurses to do amazing things.  They have kept me alive for three years longer that most would have imagined.  I still don’t know why God allows some people to do well and others he takes to his heavenly home way too quickly.  I just know that that there is something more I am to do before he takes me home, maybe it is to remind people that miracles do still exist.
Cancer has given me a THANKFUL heart.  I am so thankful for my family and friends who stand beside me everyday and encourage me to keep on plugging along and not give up.  I am thankful for my children who remind me how important hugs and kisses are and inspire me to be a better mother.  I am thankful for a husband who loves me when I am not lovable and gives me a reason to keep on fighting and living. 
I hope you all find hope, compassion, a future, Godly restoration, miracles, and a thankful heart.  Happy Thanksgiving to you all.                                                   
 Michelle
//
Amazing insight, isn’t it?  It just touched my heart so much to read her words, and made me think of this song I’ve shared below.  She lives this song everyday.  I love how she said. “Hope does not mean that I am in denial about what is to come, hope is the empowerment to know that whatever is to come I can handle it.” I know that she can say this because of her trust in God, and because of this trust, she can and does live out 1 Thessalonians 5:18 “Give Thanks In Everything.”
To follow Michelle journey, see her Caring Bridge page.

 

Decorating/ FUN/DIY/ Holidays/Parties/ Kids/Family

Using Willow Tree Figurines For a Beautiful Thanksgiving Tablescape

My sister, Julie, has collected Willow Tree Figurines for years.  I have always drooled over her collection and found them so meaningful and beautiful.  When she posted a photo of her Thanksgiving tablescape on Instagram, I drooled even more, and was blown away with how simple and beautiful it was.  

If you are not familiar with Willow Tree Figurines, here is there website.  They make wonderful gifts to mark the most important and life-changing events in life.  I love that they address all areas of life, from the good (family) to the bad (illness) and create gifts that often times speak louder than words. 

Back to my sisters table, I am going to be sitting at that table later on this evening.  We are celebrating Thanksgiving a day early with my side of the family, and I CAN’T WAIT!  My sister has made it so easy on me this year.  While she has been cleaning, decorating, baking, cooking and planning fun family games, I have been relaxing and roasting a turkey.  Yep, that is all I have to do is show up with my turkey.

{My sisters pies ready to bake}
{um, YUM!}
Here is her menu. Oh, and that drooling issue I have? It is starting again as I type!

{Menu}
Turkey 
Stuffing
Sweet Potato Souffle
 Twice Baked Potatoes
 Crumb Topped Broccoli Casserole
Aunt Fannie’s Squash Casserole
 Corn Casserole
Rolls
 Deviled Eggs
 Pecan Pie
 Pumpkin Pie
Triple Berry Pie
Country Cherry Pie
Chocolate Chip Cookies
{I’m making Turkey, Lil’ Sis is making Deviled Eggs & Pumpkin Dessert, JULIE IS MAKING THE REST.} 
{Isn’t she beautiful?  Stop drooling…}

She is amazing at many things, but when hostessing our family for holidays she shines and does it better than anyone I know.  I love her dearly, and I’m afraid I just don’t tell her often enough what a gift she is in my life and how very, very thankful I am for her.  
She has always been there for me…ALWAYS…but when I went through treatment for cancer, she was by my side.  She lived an hour away, yet made that drive a bazillion times and was by my side through it all.  She saw me at my worst, my most sick.  I know it was hard for her to see, but she just kept showing up and caring for me.  I can’t think of many times  in my life when I felt such love.

On top of it all, she is one of the funniest people I know.  Her texts make me belly laugh, and she is always the life of the party on our ‘sister nights.’ 
I love you Jules, and I’m more thankful for you than words can say.  

Kids/Family

What’s Up With Me


What I’m doing?
~enjoying a chill Sunday afternoon
~planning my posts for the week
~about to go shopping with some teenagers.  The kids at the non profit that my husband works for earn behavior bucks and get to ‘shop’ at a store that I am in charge of setting up.  The store needs restocked, so we will shop until we drop today.  Shopping at a store to set up and stock a store.  Get it…got it?  Good.

What I did today?
Went to church.
Went to Walmart
Made quiche for lunch
Made Peppermint Chocolate Loaf for an event with my husbands work. 
Burned Peppermint Chocolate Loaf that I made for husbands work.
One load of laundry.
A sink full of dishes.

What I’m listening to?
Chris Tomlin on Spotify

What I’m tasting?
Coffee

What I’m smelling?
Burned Peppermint Chocolate Loaf.  Blech.

What I’m thinking?
that there is no one like my God.  I was reminded again this morning in church just how big His love and grace is.  There is NOTHING, nothing, one can do that His love would not cover.  

What makes me laugh?
 How often I have had to tell myself this week, “Life is NOT an emergency.  Take a deep breath.  One thing at a time.”  I’m learning.  {SMH with a chuckle}

What I’m planning?
5 hooks in my bathroom to hold 5 towels.  One for each family member.  If their towel is not on the hook, they will have to drip dry.  This Mama’s not joking.  I have HAD IT with washing a billion towels each week!  Can I get an amen?

What I hope for?
A week of thankfulness.  A thankful perspective.
What I’m excited about?
Personal growth.  Growth as a family.

What I dread?
Painting my kitchen.

What has surprised me?
how fast this week went.  How much better I feel this Sunday compared to last Sunday.  Last Sunday my ears were so plugged (Influenza left me with an ear infection) that I had to keep asking Todd if I was singing too loud in church.  He just smiled at me mischievously and would not tell me.  Isn’t that lovely?

What I’m thankful for?
a warm home full of people I love, & recorded television

What melted me?
my husband choosing to talk gently & calmly to me when I knew he was frustrated and really could have given me an earful.  Grace.

What I’m wearing?
A stripy white and grey shirt that matches my new shower curtain.  I like grey.  I like stripes.  

What I wish was different?
The darn burned Peppermint Chocolate Loaf.

What I’m hungry for?
I’ll give you one guess…yep…Peppermint Chocolate Loaf.  

What I ate today?
~This amazing oatmeal concoction–we call it Banana Oatmeal Chia Pudding.  
~Quiche & Tater Tots
~a bite of my daughters Snickerdoodle cookie she bought at the mall

What I want?
a mended friendship with a dear one that feels broken

How I’m feeling?
At peace & healthy

P.S.  For those of you who want the recipe for Peppermint Chocolate Loaf, there is not one.
It was a box mix from Trader Joes.

HEALTH/ Kids/Family

To Flu Shot or Not To Flu Shot

I sit in a quiet house, and I’m not really sure how I feel about that!  My introverted self usually embraces quiet, craves it, really.  But the last 3 weeks I have been around those I hold most dear, my 3 girls and husband, pretty much 24/7!  We had a wonderful, 2 week family vacation to Orlando Disney, but brought Influenza A back with us, so we have spent the last week together in this house trying to get healthy.  We have had lots of sweet time together, which makes being alone feel strange.

{watching Karate Kid and eating chicken noodle soup with my Lil’ one}

It has been a really long time since I have had sick kids.  They used to be sick ALL THE TIME, but changing our eating habits and taking supplements have really kept them out of the Doctors office for years.  They have had a cold here or there, but it was gone quickly and they would barely skip a beat.  Our last 3 days at Disney, we ate a whole bunch of junk & I got out of the habit of making them take supplements, AND we all shared a water bottle each day at the park.  Enter Influenza A.

Influenza A = a very humbled Amy.

My word, this sickness hit us HARD and fast.  High fevers for 4 days is just miserable in itself, but add body aches, sore throats & THE COUGHING!  I had to laugh at times listening to the sounds of my home–duets, trios and quartets of coughs.  It was nuts!

I have to admit that I was pretty surprised my immune system didn’t kick in faster.  It made me realize I can rely too much on doing what I think is important to stay healthy instead of putting my faith in God to keep us healthy.  It also reminded me that yes, I am a home remedy girl, but I believe there is a time and place for medication.

I was going on day 5 of high fever, and Doctor decided prescribe Tamiflu for me since I am high risk of complications due to radiation to my chest area.  My fever broke just a few hours after taking my first Tamiflu, and I felt so much better once I was on that medication.  It was such relief.  Honestly, I felt like Influenza was laughing at my herbal tea efforts…it didn’t make me feel better at all.  Echinecea tea is great for colds, I’m sipping on it right now for a secondary sinus infection, but Influenza is a whole different ballgame.

Another example of medicine being necessary was for my Lil One.  She was the first with symptoms, poor thing had to fly home with a fever of 103.  Anytime she gets a cold or allergy, she immediately struggles with asthma.  She had RSV as a baby and has always struggled with breathing when sick.  She came out of the influenza quite well, 4 days and she was doing good, except for a lingering cough.  It was an asthmatic cough, deep and constant.  It made no sense that this cough was so bad when her fever had been gone a few days, so I took her back to the Doctor, and we found out she had an pretty nasty ear infection!  This is what was causing drainage which was triggering her asthmatic cough.  I agreed, reluctantly, to antibiotics…and I am so glad I did.  My baby had relief within 24 hours of taking them.  Her cough stopped, she slept through the night, and was able to go to school today.

{pause} I know I have readers that would be horrified that I gave my child antibiotics.  I also know I have readers that would be horrified if I didn’t!  Just know I am grateful for ALL my readers and look forward to the comments on this post. {unpause}

So, I believe there is a place for medication.  I am extremely thankful for our Doctors, nurses & their expertise.  I also believe there is a place for alternative ways to treat illness, which I am using now (and will write more about in a future post) for a secondary sinus infection that I have developed.  I have a Doctor appointment tomorrow and will have her prescribe some antibiotics just in case, but I have a feeling that I won’t need that prescription. I am quite convinced that I am killing this infection with some awesome home remedies.  I don’t want to speak too soon, but there are some things that I am doing that seem to be working! We shall see…and I shall share, soon!

I saved the best for last.

The Flu Shot.

Quite controversial.  

I had (and still might have) a belief that high enough levels of Vitamin D in our bodies are just as protective as a Flu vaccine, and safer.  Because of this belief, we have not had flu shots in over 5 years, and we have never had the flu, until now.  But, we also got the flu it when our Vitamin D levels were low, due to not supplementing while on vacation.

I have to be honest with you and tell you, I have no idea if we will be getting the flu vaccine next year or not.  I DO know I never want Influenza A again, or to watch my kids suffer through it.  I will also say, that a couple other things made me pause and reconsider my beliefs.

Our kids had to wear masks in the Doctors office after we were diagnosed.  The nurse who came in also had one on.  When the Doctor came in, she did not, AND she didn’t flinch when fact to face with my girls examining them, and they were coughing all over her (masks were off.)  I said she was brave, and she looked at me and said…”oh no worries, I have had the flu vaccine.”  Here is a lady who has been a Doctor for years, who is around Influenza, the beast, all the time, and was not worried a bit.  Made me pause.

Another thing that made me rethink my stance was a comment from a reader.  She said she worked in the medical community for 15 years, got the flu shot every year, and has never had the flu.  One more example– my Mother-in-Law gets the shot every year and has never had the flu.

So, what are your thoughts?  I am eager to hear your opinions in the comment section. Do you get the flu shot?  Have you heard flu shot controversy?

 I know we will have diverse opinions, because New Nostalgia’s readership is quite diverse, so let’s all be respectful and learn from one another.

Love/ Spiritual

Seventy Times Seven

The song in the video below made me think, and honestly, I didn’t want to.  I just wanted to plug my ears and ignore it…

…these lyrics:
“This is love.  This is hate.  We have a choice to make.”
Does this mean if I’m not choosing to love, then I am choosing to hate?  
Ouch.  
To often I wait around to make the choice until my emotions change.  I sit around in my funk and wait until I feel like being forgiving.  I wait until I feel like the person I have issues with is acting like one who deserves to be loved or at least acts in a way to make it easier to love them.  But this is not the way of Jesus.  
His Word says:
Do not say, “I’ll pay you back for this wrong!” Wait for the Lord, and he will deliver you.
He says when asked how many times to forgive:
“Not seven, but seventy times seven.”
It is not natural.  It doesn’t feel right.  It doesn’t feel good.  
Yet, it is the way of Jesus, and I call myself a Christ- follower.  Who and what am I following really?  Love? Or hate?
And these lyrics:
“Give me grace to forgive them, cuz I feel like the one losing”
It has to be from Him, His grace, for me to take a step and swallow my pride and choose to love.  To face the real possibility of rejection.  To be brave enough to love despite not feeling loved, resting in the One who loves completely.  Is His love enough?  Do I grasp just how amazing His love is?  Do I rest enough in it that I allow it to fill the void, the breaks that happen to my heart from others who are also just needing grace and their cracks filled up, too?
Thank goodness God doesn’t wait to love me until I am acting like one who deserves to be loved.  Why do I think this is ok for me to do this to another?  
Ephesians 4:32

HOME/ Kids/Family/ Organizing

The Ultimate Disney World Packing List and Finding Peace on a Family Vacation

Looking for the Ultimate Disney Packing List?

Find it Here

 

Disney Guide{my husband lives and breathes Disney.  Here is is favorite Disney planning guid.}

 

Guess who is in Florida about to visit Mickey?  ME. Me. MEEE!  Our long awaited family vacation has finally arrived.  My Todd has been busy for over a year planning this trip.  Our girls, ages 13, 11 & 9 are ALMOST too old for princesses, so we needed to get ourselves to Disney asap!

Before we hit the theme parks, we are taking a couple days to just chill out at St. Pete’s Beach.  It has been wonderful so far.  This is our girls very first time to fly and to see the ocean, so seeing them experience such fun things has really been special.

What is most special is the fact that I am here with my family.  We started talking about this trip shortly after I was diagnosed, and I so desperately wanted to make it through my cancer.  Honestly, I did not let myself get excited about this trip until just a few days before, when I was packing and was using the super handy list above.  I was afraid to let myself get excited.  So many unexpected things happened after my diagnosis, so many twists and turns of my journey, enough to show me that you never know when “the other shoe will drop.”  I am starting to get used to living life with that feeling.  All survivors have to, it is part of the fight–knowing that life can change drastically at any moment and learning to find peace within that feeling.

Well, in sunny Florida, peace is pretty easy to find.  I know I will be finding it tomorrow afternoon, as the resort we are staying at has a few hammocks hanging over white sands with the ocean as a soundtrack, waves on repeat.  Ahhh….peace.

Counting Gifts/ FAMILY

One Thousand Gifts In Pics

#968-#986
~My Favorite Sushi Place
~My Oldest Girl

My Gym, Gifted to Me When I Was Sick.  Still a Gift..
~ Morning Breakfast and Devotions with Lil’ One
 ~Date Night 
~Simple Suppers

~Quiet Reading Time While Husband Takes Girls to the Park

~Food Truck Dinner Date Night

~Homemade Pad Thai by My Sister
~What Could Be and What Is
  ~Staying in Jammies Until Mid-day
~Lil’ Ones Amazing Hand Art
 ~Her Fuzzy Slippers
 ~How Keen She is on Keen’s

 ~Men Who Grocery Shop
 ~Pizza Bought by Grandpa on Pizza Sunday

~Chill Time at Grandpa & Grandma’s House
 ~Cousins New Puppy..a New Family Member!
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