Counting Gifts/ FAMILY/ Leaving A Legacy/ Spiritual

When Apathy is No Longer an Option

I am honored to have Katie Polley, writing for Love Justice International, as a guest here today. Please read about the very important work they do and share it if you feel led to help spread the word about this amazing nonprofit. The world needs to know about it!

–Amy

Love Justice International

by Katie Polley, writing for Love Justice International

In 2016, I started helping a nonprofit with their social media and website content for a couple hours a week. I worked with many clients at the time and had little reason to suspect that getting to know this nonprofit would drastically impact the way I desire to live my life.

Love Justice International is compelled by God’s love to fight the world’s greatest injustices—one of which is human trafficking—an issue I had heard a lot about but hadn’t really ever engaged deeply with. It felt far away from my little world. The numbers were so big (in 2016, the Global Slavery Index estimated that 40.3 million people live in slavery), and felt impersonal. And ultimately, I was ignorant.

This all changed as I began to learn more about the people and work behind Love Justice. As I started receiving story after story from the field, I quickly realized they didn’t just see and talk about the issue of human trafficking, but quite literally they entered into the very trenches of it to stop it. God woke me up.

You see, Love Justice is unique from most anti-trafficking agencies in that rather than working on the preventative or the reactive side of human trafficking, they actually intervene at the exact moment when trafficking is occurring, and they intercept the potential victim before she is trafficked.

So I began reading account after account of young women, from various countries, who were being taken across borders, bus stations, or airports, but instead were intersected by Love Justice’s trained monitors. Young women like Sanjula who was most likely headed into a life of some form of slavery, marked by unimaginable darkness and despair. But instead, because there were justice-fighters stationed, waiting, and seeking out girls just like her, she was literally intercepted and turned around.

Instead of traveling further with her trafficker, Sanjula was educated on the dangers of trafficking and safe foreign employment. She was cared for, counseled and comforted, and then sent to safety.

These stories of real people like Sanjula¸were oftentimes girls my age. They were children of God—with names, families, beautiful facial features, unique hopes, and dreams. Their stories deeply affected how I thought about human trafficking, justice, and my role in it as a fellow child of God. I was no longer ignorant, and apathy was no longer an option. I couldn’t deny how these stories of faithful people pursuing the vulnerable girl who was being deceived into a life of slavery and darkness, perfectly reflected God’s pursuit of me.

It’s the gospel—the story I’ve been graced to hear throughout my whole life. The God of the universe passionately wanted to save me from the slavery of the sin I was born with. He wanted freedom and a relationship with me so much that He didn’t stay in the heavenly places and leave me to my helpless estate, but instead, He literally moved heaven and earth to come up with a plan, a strategy, the only way to save me in His son, Jesus Christ.

He pursued me! He entered into the mess, the danger, the pain, and came down to earth, taking the punishment I deserved and made a new way for me. He turned my path around and offered freedom, light, and hope.

This is the reflection I saw in every Love Justice interception story I read from across the globe. In the same way, God pursued justice for me and came to save me, Love Justice was literally placing people right where the injustice of trafficking was happening, so they could intercept victims’ paths towards slavery and instead offer them freedom. What an amazing, beautiful picture of how God pursues us!

And even more than that, He has made each of us in His own image. So the same heart of His that craves justice is in us. He built in our hearts a desire for justice, a hunger for wrongs to be righted, a quest for things to be dealt with. When we truly know God and His love, and we truly know the reality of injustices like human trafficking, our hearts cannot help but be compelled to be a part of stopping it.

The joy and meaning I’ve found in being able to work alongside and play a small role in what Love Justice is doing have been immeasurable. Simply put, God is using this ministry to bring more of His Kingdom here on earth—to destroy injustice and usher in freedom for the oppressed. To date, they’ve intercepted over 16,000 lives to prevent them from being trafficked. And each one of those interceptions results in powerful intelligence that allows them to assist local police with criminal investigations and arrests of the perpetrators.

When you see God moving like this, the same God who saved you from spiritual darkness, it’s hard to not jump at the chance to be a part of it. So today, at the very end of Human Trafficking Prevention Month, I want to invite you to be a part of Love Justice with me! Allow your life to be impacted by the beauty of leaning into God’s heart for justice with action. Go to LoveJustice.ngo to learn more about how you can get involved with your time, treasure, and talents.

{Please Pin!}

HEALTH/ Spiritual

Morning Coffee Mug Scripture Habit on my Instagram InstaStory

Morning Coffee Mug Scripture Habit

I have a morning coffee mug Scripture habit that has been well received by my Instagram followers, and that makes me very happy! It is so fun to share something that is such a meaningful part of my mornings in an easy way. I put a verse or inspiration on an image of my coffee mug then simply share that image on my Instagram Story.

Coffee and Scripture God Time with the Bible App

Purposeful, slow living is important to me. One of the very first things I do each day to make #slowliving a reality is to have what I call “God Time.” I sit with a mug of coffee, a blanket, my phone and my journal. I’m usually cuddled up in a corner of our couch or in a comfy chair we have in our bedroom. Lately, I have been sitting outside in our backyard, no blanket needed!

I use my apps on my phone to spend time with God, the main apps being YouVersion Bible App & IF App. When I read anything that really sticks or speaks to me, I quickly copy and paste it into my Notes in a folder labeled “God Time” and each note separated by the date, starting a new note for each new day. I then pull anything I want to share from that Note. Most days I end the time with prayer. If I have extra time, I will take some time to journal, too.

Habits Take Time

This quiet time is something I truly look forward to each day, but this was not always the case. I remember when my teens were young, I yearned for the desire and discipline to spend time daily time with my Creator, but I was tired and often distracted. I asked God to help me with this and over the years time with him has grown into a sweet, necessary habit.

Habits take time and purposeful, repetitive action to build. It has helped that my ‘littles’ are grown, that I have become more of a morning person, and life challenges over the years have revealed my deep need for God. These are all things that make spending time with him easier, plus he is a good Father and will always answer a prayer of his child that is asked according to his will.

What is Instagram Stories?

Instagram Stories or “InstaStory” is a newish feature on Instagram that lets you share little snippets of your day, without worrying about overposting. As you share multiple photos and videos, they appear together in a slideshow format which becomes your story. You can get creative with it by adding text and using drawing tools. I keep mine fairly simple, but I do love the text tool! The photos and videos disappear 24 hours after bring posted, which keeps clutter to a minimum.

You can see stories from those you follow in a bar at the top of your Instagram feed. When there is something new to see, their profile photo will have a colorful ring around it. Just tap on this ringed profile photo to watch someone’s story.

It is easy to view at your own pace. Tap to go back or forward or swipe to go to the next person’s story. I love that you can hold your finger on the screen to pause someone’s story, which is very handy when reading text.

FOLLOW ME ON INSTAGRAM

USERNAME: @amy_newnostalgia

(psst..you can only view InstaStories on the mobil app)

Morning Coffee Mug Scripture Sharing on Instastories

It is fun to start each days Instagram Story with a fresh new picture of my morning coffee mug. My followers have commented that they love seeing where each day begins on my story by the familiar mug photo, and are inspired by the words I share. I’m not surprised by that, as God’s word promises to “never return void.” {Isaiah 55:11} When I share scripture, I share his words, not mine.

How To Easily Share Regular Inspiration on Social Media

If you desire to share regular inspiration on social media, find a time where you regularly do something every day and fit it into that time. I have a mug of coffee every day, so this was the perfect fit for me. There are so many habits we automatically do every day– eating breakfast, brushing teeth, putting on makeup, sitting in the driver’s seat of your car–any of these times could be a time where you pause a minute and build the habit of sharing inspiration on social media. We all know social media could use a bit of positive inspiration!

With Instagram, photos are live on the Instastory for 24 hours, then disappear. I have my settings to where it will automatically save the photos I share to my camera roll, so I have gathered some of my favorites Coffee Mug Scriptures to share with you today!

Another version of this verse says “Draw near to God and He will draw near to you.” What a cool promise, and one that has come true in my life. When I clear the time and space to come close to God and his message, he responds and his words become real to me and give me life.

When someone loves and adores you, it is not too hard to do what they desire. I pray often that God would reveal to me just how much he loves me. His love for his children is so immense and perfect that our human minds just can’t wrap around it! Yet, I’ve had many glimpses and boy is it beautifully overwhelming! When we are truly and fully loved by someone, we trust them to want the best for us. Obedience out of this knowledge is so sweet.

This is not an easy verse, especially when you are wronged and it just isn’t fair. I love the reminder of how many times Christ has forgiven me. Over and over and over. Who am I to withhold forgiveness from another? Yet, I do. Even when I think I am a forgiving person, God will show me where I am holding an offense or one will come my way and I will have a choice to make. Lord, help me to choose to forgive!

This is ultimately what I am doing each morning. Seeking his face. He tells us to, and I just know he smiles when we do!

Ya’ll. This verse can be hard for me. I have an anxiety disorder so perfect peace is something I don’t take for granted. I HAVE experienced it so often in my life. A supernatural peace from God. Having to fight my default of anxiety and choose to trust and believe has been a fight for me, but God has met me in that and shown me it is worth it. There is nothing like his peace.

Well. This one. James 1 has always been a favorite chapter of the Bible for me. I memorized it when I was young and it always stuck with me. Man it is hard to wrap my human mind around being thankful for test & trials to the point of considering them a gift. I HAVE seen how hardships cause me to lean in and show me my need for a Savior. I have seen God’s faithfulness in every single hardship. The gift is more of him. The gift is sharing in suffering, with him and with others.

This reminder that God has overcome the world, that there is the hope of Heaven, that this is not all there is, that we are made for more than this earth and it’s difficulties–yes! That we can be unshakable, assured and deeply at peace if we trust him. Yes!

Above all else is love. It holds all the things.

Another verse on trust. He is trustworthy. He is good. He knows the future. He knows our stories. He sees it all and holds it all. His timing is perfect.

Do you have any #slowliving routines?

What is something you do every day that you could fit sharing some positive inspiration on social media? Is this even something that interests you?

Want to see fresh Coffee Mug Scripture and inspiration? Follow me on Instagram @amy_newnostalgia.

Emotional Health/ FAMILY/ Spiritual

14 Ways I Found Relief From Severe Anxiety

About a week ago, I wrote a post titled Severe Anxiety Symptoms – Words From My Journal. The response I received from this post has been big and I’ve spent the week reading so many of your precious, personal stories.

Thank you for sharing with me and letting me know that the post mattered, that telling my story allows you to feel less alone in yours. You share with me and I in turn, also feel less alone. There are many of us in this together. In fact, anxiety disorders are the most common mental illness in the U.S., affecting 40 million adults in the United States age 18 and older, or 18% of the population. (Source: National Institute of Mental Health)

There are so many who can relate to the pain that anxiety can bring, and often anxiety can lead to depression or visa versa, for these two often go hand in hand. One can trigger the other.

I read and heard your stories of both depression and anxiety.

A dear one wrote, “I am on the bed right now, nauseated , heart pounding, trembling, etc.” She shares her heart and mine breaks for her. I’ve been in that place.

When you want to just curl up in a ball and stay in bed all day please know that there is hope. When your hearts feels like it is pounding out of your chest and you really don’t know why, know that there is hope. When you feel alone, know that you are not.

I will share a few ways that I found relief from my severe anxiety. I pray that some of these suggestions can help bring hope and help to someone else.

14 Ways I Found Relief From Anxiety

Know God’s Got You

~Know that there is a place where you can lift your eyes & where I continue lift mine. You are never alone, God will help you & He can turn ashes into beauty.

“I lift my eyes up….my help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven & earth.” Psalm 121:1-2

“God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.” Psalm 46:1

“To provide for them that mourn…to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the LORD, that he might be glorified.” Isaiah 61:3

Ask For Wisdom

~I prayed constantly for wisdom in searching for answers for my severe anxiety. God led me to answers, slowly but surely. It was in His time, not mine.

Tell Someone

~tell a trusted friend, a medical doctor, a therapist, a psychologist or psychiatrist.

I did all of the above. I was desperate for help and answers, and the more support in finding those answers, the better. It took all of those people I listed above to get to the answers I needed. You never know who and what God is going to use to bring relief to your suffering.

{Example: It was a medical doctor, an OB to be exact, that had an answer to my morning nausea & weight loss. As we were trying to figure out what was causing my severe morning nausea, she gave me a medication specifically for women with morning sickness, one that is taken the night before. This was a key step to stabilizing me & helping me wake up steadily instead of waking up to heaves of nausea due to my severe anxiety. It allowed me to eat early in the day, which was huge as nutrition was another key to getting better. I took this medication for about 3 months, long enough for me to stabilize and for us to figure out my physical symptoms were not due to cancer returning but to severe anxiety.}

One of the most precious gifts to me during this time having a dear, MOST trusted friend. One that had walked a similar road. We used Voxer app and talked daily. It was so healthy to talk to someone who would love and accept me no matter what, someone who could handle my tears as they flowed freely while I talked. Find that someone and be willing to open up to them. I you don’t have someone like that, pray that God would provide someone for you.

Pursue Help

As stated above, one of the key things I did to get healthy again was to pursue help. I brought in as many professionals as I could. I went to many, many appointments, as I knew that there was an answer but it was not just going to come to me. Because of my cancer history, we had to rule out recurrence, so the number of my appointments and tests were overwhelming, but I continued on. I pressed on and pursued help for the sake of my family & because I had faith that God would lead me to what I needed. It was miserable to go when I was feeling so unwell,and I hated spending my summer in doctors offices, but it paid off in the end. There is help out there! Pursue it, and if you can’t, ask a loved one to help you pursue it.

Be Open To Medication

If your symptoms are severe, you will probably need medication, even if for a short time. I am not a professional, obviously, but please see a professional if you cannot seem to get to a healthy place on your own. I cannot tell you what a blessing medication has been to me. I do not know where I would be without it. It is a gift and one that I do not take for granted.

Just Do The Next Thing

There were so many days where I just felt so miserable and couldn’t think straight. I had nothing to give. I was too miserable to lay in bed but too miserable to do anything either, at least that is how it seemed. My new mantra during that time was “Just Do The Next Thing.” Most of the time, the next thing was as simple as getting up.

I remember just getting up and standing by my bed, and then thinking and talking myself through what came next.

“Just Do The Next Thing.”

Make my bed.

“Just Do The Next Thing.”

Get dressed.

“Just Do The Next Thing.”

Take the girls to school.

“Just Do The Next Thing.”

Dishes in dishwasher and throw a load of laundry in.

“Just Do The Next Thing.”

Drive the girls to the pool.

“Just Do The Next Thing.”

Get self to a doctor appointment.”

“Just Do The Next Thing.”

Eat even though you lack appetite.

By just doing the next thing, I got through my days and eventually got through the summer and eventually got the answers I needed.

Do What is Necessary

Do what is necessary, and if you can, do a little more, but keep it minimal and simple.

I was in survival mode, but I still had to live for those I love. I am a survivor & fighter, and this was by far the hardest season for me, even including fighting cancer. Anxiety kicked me hard, but I still had to be a Mom & Wife, even when I was sick everyday. My minimal looked like the “Just Do The Next Thing” above. Getting dressed, dishes, laundry, meals for my family (super simple meals), blog when I could, & then rest. Baby steps and one foot in front of the other. I felt I was trudging through quicksand most days, but if I stopped, I would sink. Motion is a must when it comes to anxiety and depression, even if super slow motion.

Keep Trying Different Options

If what you are doing is not working, try something else. I had to try several medications before finding the right one. I had to go off all of my cancer meds to see if that was what was causing my physical symptoms and weight loss. It took time and persistence. I tried at least 4 different mood meds. Eventually, it was an anti-nausea medication and an anti-anxiety medication that worked. In the past, I took an anti-depressant, and for some reason that did not work and what my body needed was purely an anti-anxiety medication. If I did not keep trying different options, I would have never found an answer.

Know That Talk Therapy is as Important as Medication

I was very thankful to be able to see a therapist and talk through what I was experiencing that the time. This was super helpful, even when at the beginning I could barely articulate what I was feeling and just ended up with tears streaming. Those early sessions I did a lot of listening and nodding. I eventually got to the point where I could talk and it was super helpful. My therapist watched me become a different person as I found the right medication, and then she walked me through the healing process, as she knew that now I was stable and could hear what she was saying and talk through the trauma of it all.

Can’t afford therapy? I understand. Mine was gifted to me. There are other options. A great one is one I have recently found and followed. His name is John Cordray and he calls himself the Calm Expert. He is a licensed therapist and has great wisdom. There is an option to hire him, but he also gives great free advice on his YouTube & Periscope channel.

Eat When You Can

Nutrition is so important. I lost 20 pounds in less than 7 weeks. It was not pretty. It scared me. I didn’t have an appetite and had nausea all day until early evening. I was not able to take supplements, and I believe this was a huge part of my downward spiral. I was not nourished and there are so many vitamins and minerals that are vital for brain health.

B vitamins, Omega’s, Vitamin D, Probiotics, Multi-Vitamin, Magnesium & Zinc are all examples of what I take now and are huge for mental health, but I could not tolerate them when I was in the midst of severe anxiety. Again, it took medication for me to become stable, regain my appetite, lose the nausea and be able to tolerate supplements.

Surround Yourself with Comfort

A cozy blanket, a cup of tea, soft music, candlelight. These things seem small, but even the smallest bit of comfort helps when anxiety is taking over.

Exercise

I know, I know. It seems impossible. At times it was. I can’t speak too much on this subject as I still continue to struggle with it, but I KNOW walking makes a huge difference in my day. Simple, even slow walking gets you out and moving, and is beneficial, especially in the sunshine.

Push Truth to Your Brain

This one was huge for me. I knew I had to replace fear, worries & lies with truth. I knew I had to keep my faith as strong as possible. I did this by reading, by listening to podcasts, and by watching YouTube videos.

The Bible was key for me, as my personal belief is that it has the power to transform. I use the YouVersion Bible app on my phone and followed plans specifically for anxiety and hope.

Jesus Calling–another app on my phone that I read everyday. A small snippet of truth that would get me through the day.

Switch On Your Brain-a book (affiliate link) that I read that was so good that it is on my list to read again.

Journaling the Psalms– I wrote a post about this when I was at the tail-end of my severe anxiety. It details what it is and how I did it, & how it helped change me.

Affirmations–a dear friend sent me daily affirmations on cards that she has. I will be creating similar cards soon to share on the blog.

Podcasts--even while laying there, miserable, one can listen to a podcast. I highly recommend Daily Hope With Rick Warren & listen to it often while on a walk or doing housework. I also love listening to my own pastor, Pastor Bryan Clark of Lincoln Berean Church

Know That There Will Be An End

Never lose hope. Know that there are answers. Know that with God all things are possible. Ask Him for help, for He is the Ultimate help in trouble and calls Himself our Comforter.

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. 2 Corinthians 1:3-4

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I hope this list helps. I will continue to share bits of my journal here at New Nostalgia & continue talking about anxiety. I think it is so important to talk about as so many are suffering.

What about you? Have you ever had anxiety? Depression?

If you are comfortable sharing, I would love to know your story & what has helped you.

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Severe Anxiety Symptoms – An Excerpt From My Journal

Top 5 Ways To Relieve Stress

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Disclaimer:

NEVER DISREGARD MEDICAL ADVICE OR DELAY SEEKING MEDICAL CARE BECAUSE OF SOMETHING YOU HAVE READ ON OR ACCESSED THROUGH THIS WEB SITE.

DIY/Crafts/ Homemaking/ Spiritual

When Hopelessness Needs a Remedy + Simple Curtain Hack

**This is a guest post by Deidra Riggs. She is my dear friend and neighbor, and I am so excited to have her here as guest at New Nostalgia. This post is just a glimpse of her authentic, loving heart—a heart that has been there for me & prayed me through some of my toughest life moments. Read on to know why her heart is happy these days, and enjoy the Simple Window Hack at the end of the post.

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I’ve been having a secret celebration in my heart these days.

One year ago today, I was one sick woman. Last February, I had a business trip in California and, when it was over, I flew to Vancouver to meet up with my husband. It was the week of Valentine’s Day. Rarely do we do anything really special for Valentine’s Day, but last year, we decided to take a trip so that my husband could ski and I could write.

We had a great trip. While not the best ski weather (it rained nearly every day), it was good for us to get away and spend some time together. At the end of the week, we flew home to Nebraska and, not long after we’d settled back into our routine, I came down with a nasty virus.

It was one of those viruses that wrestles a person to the ground in about twelve hours. At first, I thought it was just a cold, and that I could press my way through it for three or four days. I was wrong. By the end of the first day, I knew I’d have to surrender and so, I climbed into bed, hoping to doctor myself back to health with Tylenol and NyQuil. But this one was a doozy. I was achy from the fever and worn out from the coughing. My head maintained a constant ache that made me wonder if someone had implanted a knife behind my eyes when I wasn’t looking.

That virus knocked me down for two entire weeks. Somewhere in the middle of those fourteen days, my husband drove me to see my doctor. She checked me out and then patted me gently on my knee. “This thing is going around,” she said. “It’s nasty, and you just have to tough it out.” So, home I went. Back to bed.

Now, worse than being sick with that virus was the fact that it rendered me incapable of doing anything but lie in my bed in my empty house with nothing but the thoughts in my head. My husband came home each day at lunch to check on me. At night, he’d bring me dinner and sit with me in the bedroom. But, for most of the day, I was all by myself and it that was not good. Not good at all.

Depression is a nasty bugger. For me, it usually begins with a sad or scary or sinister thought that won’t let go. It keeps running itself around on a little track in my head and, before I know what hit me, I’ve fallen down the rabbit hole of hopelessness. If you’ve ever experienced it, you know what I’m talking about. In those times, it’s a struggle to hold onto any shred of anything that offers hope.

Last year, in my bed, hope came through the window. I’d turn over onto my right side and peek out through the curtains, looking for a slice of blue between the branches, or listening for the call of the cardinal. Sometimes, a robin would land on the peak of the roof just on the other side of the screen. Most of the time, the hope lasted for just a few minutes, but a few minutes of hope is a magnificent deposit in the battle against deep sadness. Slowly, over a few weeks (at the tail end of that virus, I got a nasty case of strep throat which set me back for another week), my body healed and I was able to get myself outdoors. There, with daily doses of sunshine and fresh air and the promise of Spring, my mind found its way back to wholeness.

This year, I was silently fearing February. I know it was an irrational fear, but it was there, just the same. I was afraid I’d get sick again and wind up with a repeat of last year. But, here we are, all the way into Spring! Hoorah!

There is no guarantee that I’ll never be sick again. I probably will be, because we live in that kind of world. But, each time I pass by a window, or hear the song of a cardinal, I’m reminded of the power of hope, even in the smallest dose. And you, sweet warrior? You who know these feelings, too? I’m praying the power of hope over you today. May it reach you through the window of even the tiniest faith, and restore your beautiful soul.

And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love. (Romans 5:5)

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SIMPLE CURTAIN HACK

Here’s a little decorating hack for the windows that surround you. It’s one I’ve used for many years and I love it because it’s sooooo inexpensive and easy! Not a single tool required. All you need is a tension rod, two tea towels, and some drapery hooks on rings. The total cost of this easy window hack? Less than $15!

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Deidra Riggs is a national speaker, editor, and the founder & host of Jumping Tandem: The Retreat. She has been a featured speaker at Q Women, TEDx, and The City Gates Initiative, as well as several women’s events, including Allume, Winsome Retreat, the Beautiful Life Conference, and Compel. She is a contributing writer for Incourage, and her work has been featured online at the Washington Post and Today’s Christian Woman.

Deidra is the author of “Every Little Thing: Making a World of Difference Right Where You Are.” Her second book will release in the Spring of 2017. Deidra and her husband are the proud parents of two adult children, and the happy inhabitants of an empty nest. They live in Lincoln, Nebraska.

Follow her here: Website | Twitter | Instagram | Facebook | Pinterest

5 Minute Fridays/ Spiritual

Forced Rest

{I am participating in 5 minute Friday. We are given a word, then write 5 minutes. Today’s word is REST.}

And…Go:

REST

I sit in this room where rest has been forced.

Our dear friends, a car accident, a traumatic brain injury & months of healing and rest.

In this room I’ve witnessed pain, determination, suffering, triumph, tears, celebration, testimony & rest.

I’ve watched a hero cycle. He goes from working hard therapy, back to rest. Over & over. These are days of healing and relearning. Small increments of healing that over time add up to miracles. Days have turned into weeks that turn into months & he fights. I am a witness of this hard healing & I watch in awe.

I’ve watched his wife so brave, and although at times, stressed to the max, she is still at rest. She points consistently to the One who provides this. The One who holds her heart pieces together when it breaks. She is real with pain but still testifies how faith is made strong in weakness. She knows when she is weak God is strong and leans heavy on Him and in turn is made strong. She is another fighter who cycles, acknowledging stress then choosing to rest.

This is her lived out testimony:

“Yes, my soul, finds rest in God. My hope comes from Him.” Psalms 62:5

Stop.

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Would you be willing to know more about our dear friends and consider giving toward a fund we set up to help lighten the load? We are getting close to the goal and I know every bit helps and so appreciated!

If you are unable to give, will you pray for them? The journey has been long and the road is hard. I know your prayers will bring continued rest.

Music Renews/ Spiritual

I Am A Sinner If It’s Not One Thing It’s Another

“‘Cause I am a sinner ~ If it’s not one thing it’s another ~ Caught up in words ~ Tangled in lies
But You are a Savior ~ And You take brokenness aside ~ And make it beautiful” –ALL SONS & DAUGHTERS

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I sit in church, feeling numb from the weekend. It was a rough one. I felt on edge, worried, moody, & not myself. I have not had these feelings for a long while now, and I did not like experiencing them for one day, much less going on day three. I felt it building each day and I wonder where it came from and what would come of it.

What came of it? A teenager who is moody herself– acting fairly normal for a teen– was rude and I reacted. I lost patience and words came and frustrations spewed out and over onto my girl, lecturing, accusing & pointing fault.

I watch my words not only cause her to shut off and go into her room, but I see a shut down in my Todd. Usually when shut down happens in him, I feel hurt and uncared for. This time, I saw pain. He went inward and I saw pain in his eyes –my eyes were opened to see his– I saw his eyes reflecting pain from my words and actions not just of today, but of the past. Today hurts him deep due to history of hurt. I am faced with my history of emotional words that hurt, I then shut down and feel myself spiral inward.

Shame. Guilt. Thoughts go dark. I cause pain. Now and before. I wallow in past failures & wonder how is it that I am loved? Doubt creeps in & the enemy cozy’s up and keeps planting bits of lies here and there.

I struggled quiet, until Sunday when we gather together at church and we sing two songs and the pastor preaches words from the book of Samuel. I confess I see the message is from Samuel and I inward eye roll as I don’t think I will receive what my heart is longing for.

You know what? I don’t know much. God knows everything. He knew exactly the words my hurting heart & shadowed thinking needed to hear. Our pastor is anointed and brings the Word so faithfully. Some of his favorite words are spoken in almost every message.

“God lavishes his grace on us”

“Get out of the dark room. Run into the Light Room”

These words and visuals have saved me more than once from the Accuser.

And then this verse– from of all books– the book of Samuel:

“Samuel said to the people, “Do not fear. You have committed all this evil, yet do not turn aside from following the LORD, but serve the LORD with all your heart. You must not turn aside, for then you would go after futile things which can not profit or deliver, because they are futile. For the LORD will not abandon His people on account of His great name, because the LORD has been pleased to make you a people for Himself. Moreover, as for me, far be it from me that I should sin against the LORD by ceasing to pray for you; but I will instruct you in the good and right way. Only fear the LORD and serve Him in truth with all your heart; for consider what great things He has done for you.”

‭‭1 Samuel‬ ‭12:20-24‬ ‭NASB‬‬ (emphasis mine)

Words of truth from my pastor, God & Samuel straight to my heart. Take THAT Accuser. I find myself turning toward the Light room.

We then sing this song & I confess with its words and my toes that step into the light room & light starts shining bright. My feet walk toward the front steps of the altar–toward forgiveness– with a card in hand. We were encouraged to write on the card that which needs left in the past. I write my emotions, literally, I write down my emotions or really my lack of control over my emotions that have brought me down that weekend and in the past. I leave them and the card at the cross.

Brokenness Aside

{Brokenness Aside by All Sons & Daughters}

Will your grace run out
If I let you down
‘Cause all I know
Is how to run

‘Cause I am a sinner
If it’s not one thing it’s another
Caught up in words
Tangled in lies
But You are a Savior
And You take brokenness aside
And make it beautiful
Beautiful

Will You call me child
When I tell you lies
‘Cause all I know
Is how to cry

‘Cause I am a sinner
If it’s not one thing it’s another
Caught up in words
Tangled in lies
But You are a Savior
And You take brokenness aside
And make it beautiful
Beautiful

You make it beautiful
You make it beautiful
[x2]‘Cause I am a sinner
If it’s not one thing it’s another
Caught up in words
Tangled in lies
But You are a Savior
And You take brokenness aside
And make it beautiful
Beautiful

I am a sinner
If it’s not one thing it’s another
Caught up in words
Tangled in lies, oh yeah
But You are a Savior
And You take brokenness aside
And make it beautiful
Beautiful
[x2]

You make it beautiful
Beautiful
You make it beautiful
Beautiful

You make it beautiful
You make it beautiful
[x4]

We sing this song & I soak it in. I’ve kept singing it all these days.

Church service lets out and I go straight to week 2 of a teen parenting class. Light continues to brighten my path in that room of wonderful, wise parents trying to do their best but feel overwhelmed, and in one big voice we agree just how hard parenting teens can be. It normalizes my struggle, shows me I am not alone, shows me my girls are inward and outward beautiful and I have not failed them. I leave with feeling empowered and ready to love well.

The week starts and by the end of day 3 of dreary grey days, my heart is feeling shadowed again. Despite my wonderful Sunday, grey Monday comes and so does words of criticism and accusation, but this time they are from myself at myself.

I just couldn’t shake the shame I felt. It is hard to go so long without falling into a place you don’t want to go, and then go there and have to face it again. It allows one to see more clearly when it is no longer a habit, and I clearly saw pain that I brought to my loved ones. I wallowed in it, & was quiet and inward, until the evening of the third day. I finally talked to the man who has loved me for 20 years and knows me better than anyone.

FAMILY/ Kids/Family/ Love/ Marriage

24 Ways To Be A Helper To Your Husband

Helper: One who gives assistance or support to another, making life more pleasant or bearable.

“It is not good (sufficient, satisfactory) that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper meet (suitable, adapted, complementary) for him. I will make him a helper.”– God Genesis 2:18 (emphasis added)

So, how do you feel about being a helper? I’ve always been okay with the term, as on of my gifts is acts of service, so helping people is something I love to do, but I know many women who struggle with feeling like this title is ‘less than’ or inferior. My struggle is different. My struggle is remembering who I am called to be and putting the energy into it.

If you do struggle with this word, it might help to remember that the word Helper, is actually a precious word that God uses to describe himself!

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. Isaiah 41:10

In this verse God is assuring His people, telling them not to worry, because He will be their helper. He considers it a worthy calling, so I do to.

I’ve recently had a reawakening when it comes to wanting to be the wife God has called me to be. This has come along my heart for a couple of reasons.

I am just coming out of a season where I was quite sick for a long period of time. It has taken months to get back to myself, of which I really will write about soon, (let me reassure you that I am still in remission, much of the sickness has come from ongoing hormone treatment and side effects from that treatment) but I was so sick that I went inward, and really could only focus on getting through everyday. It was quite a selfish period…not really… but kind of. I did my best to give as much as I could each day, but physical and emotional illness caused me to not be able to give like I was used to.

The second reason is an amazing couple I know and who I wrote about, that recently went to Heaven. They had the marriage I think we all long to have. They were best friends and just did marriage so well! Here is a quote from Terri…I must share as it just hit me so hard how beautiful her thinking and way of living was.

“‘You become what the most important person in your life thinks that you are. “At the end of Ty’s life, I want him to be able to say, ‘Terri was the greatest earthly blessing in my life – the best thing that ever happened to me – and that I’m a better man because of how she loved me. And that’s the goal that I live with every day. That’s how I want to love this man.‘”

Now that I am able to focus more on others, and I have a very tangible example of what a great marriage looks like, I am very excited to start by focusing on my own and the one that is most important to me…my Todd.

In doing that, I have been reading a book and the beginning chapter talks about being a helper.

It is not really doing something, but being someone. An identity that I want to keep in the forefront of my mind. It is a worthy calling.

I ask myself: Do I make my husband’s life more pleasant and bearable? Does he depend on me? Can he now that I am feeling better? Have I communicated this to him? Does he feel my support? How do I react when he asks me to do things for him? What are things I do or can do to accomplish this?

Lately I have been able to practice the answers to these questions as it is my Todd’s most busy time of year. He works for a non-profit organization as a programs director and also as an after school reading center director. This week and next he is just swamped and has needed me to step up and take care of things he normally would take care of. This plays out practically in lots more time in the car for me…rides for our 3 girls in the evenings that he would usually give. It also looks like me going to teachers meetings alone and being quite proactive in being the main parenting figure right now, at least during the week. I hope he is starting to feel the unconditional support as my attitude in doing this purposefully and cheerfully is still pretty new. It’s not that I was unwilling before, it is just that now I want to do it in a way that makes him feel confident that the house can be run well even when he is working extra hours; and that he has a wife who is capable of picking up where he needs to let go.

Honestly, the past 2 months this would have been really, really hard to do as my health was so precarious, but thank our sweet Lord I am stronger now and able to really be proactive in my new convictions. I am so thankful for better health!

I must admit, not only did it take a change of health, but also a change of heart. It is so easy to become apathetic and not want to change. My motivation came from seeing the beauty of a marriage done God’s way, and I will forever be grateful for such a beautiful example.

My new attitude will not always come easy. I know there is an enemy of our souls that wants to bring fear, disobedience, scorekeeping, contentiousness and cause me stumble over pride. I will not let him win.

So what does being a supportive, pleasant, bearable, dependable helpmate look like for me? How am I going to live this out practically?

Well, I plan on asking Todd specifically what is most helpful for him. But in the meantime, I know him well enough to know where to start.

………………

A few steps I’m taking in being a supportive, pleasant, & dependable “Helper”:

I will soften my face when I look at my husband.

I will smile at him, even if only with my eyes.

I will be attentive, acknowledging when he walks in the room.

I will be attentive, without putting pressure or expectation on him to be attentive back.

I will hug/kiss him hello and goodbye.

I will give him time to decompress and do ‘Todd’ things when he gets home.

I will do my best to make him feel special to me, like I’m his biggest fan.

I will exude warmth.

I will not share with him all that has gone wrong with my day the minute he walks in the door.

I will pray “Lord, please help me be willing to be willing.”

I will have my closest friends ask me about how I am doing in being “helper”

I will continue give my heart only to him and no other, with protective barriers up against all others.

I will not compare him unfavorably with others

I will work on making our marriage bed the warmest place known to the both of us.

I will use words like “good morning” “have a good day” “I love you” “how are you?” “need anything?”

I will look for ways to make him feel special in my presence

I will find ways to let him know he is of great worth to me

I will figure out how to best communicate how much I respect what he does and who he is

I will be committed to all of this even when I don’t feel like he might deserve it at times.

I will love and treat him as the man I know he can be even if he is having an off day.

I will choose to see the good.

I will make “deposits” into our marriage, more than “withdraws.”

I will pick myself up and try again, even if I ‘drop the ball’ in these goals.

I will do all of this through Christ, who is the only one who can fully and perfectly love me in the way I long to be loved. As I grasp how very head over heals in love God is with me, I can then love others in the same way.

…………….

What about you? Does this list resonate with you? Does it make you fearful or nervous? Are you already doing most of these things? What are your experiences? What are your thoughts?

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