FUN/DIY Archives • Page 27 of 50 • New Nostalgia

This song expresses my heart.
I’m experiencing deep trust this weekend.
My oncologist was in surgery all day Friday so we still have no plan of action.

I’m hanging on, being held, and not forgetting how good He is.

Cancer Journey/ HEALTH/ Music Renews/ Spiritual

Pain, Perspective, Peace & A Spot On My Kidney

I have had stomach pain, it started Monday night. Woke me up in the night both Monday and Tuesday. It was severe in the night, but during the day only bothered me slightly. It did keep me from running, which frankly ticked me off, and got me to the doctor. I was suspicious of gall bladder.

I had an ultrasound yesterday morning. Yes, they think my gall bladder may not be working properly and want further testing. That is what is causing pain.

But that is not why the doctor called me at the end of the day.

She called to let me know that there is a 1-2 centimeter spot on my kidney. It showed up in an ultrasound that I had in January and was cyst-like, so we were told to watch it due to my history. Well, it now looks more solid, a nodule or lesion. They are not jumping to conclusions but because of the definite change from the ultrasound in January, the radiologist suggest further testing due to my history.

My primary care doctor is going to call my Oncologist for the “now what?” I expect a scan or two, maybe a biopsy. I will know more next week.

You have all so graciously come along on this journey with me, so I want to keep you informed. It seems like these “bumps in the road” may just be a way of life– these ups and downs with my health. I am ok with that. I have done my pouting in the past and have come to accept the ‘what is.’ I am at peace, and so thankful for how many prayers have been answered on my behalf. So many.

I am also very thankful for the perspective that all of this brings. It is a gift. I find when pain forces me to face what we all need to face, that we are here on this earth for a short time, I live. I REALLY live.

I see more clearly. I think about what matters. I notice beauty. I touch and hug my kids more. I kiss my husband more (well, I would be if he didn’t have a cold :)) I treasure the moments with those I love. I eat it all up, and I am present. That, friends, is a gift, one that I would not have to this extent, if it were not for pain.

Emotional pain, physical pain, both bring perspective.
I reach out to my Heavenly Father in these moments, I rest in His love, and I find peace.

I will keep you updated. Again, it very well could be nothing. Hoping for the best!!

Cancer Journey/ HEALTH/ Music Renews/ Spiritual

Decluttering & Finding Chemo Memories

{notice how dark the valleys are, but without them there would be no mountaintop}

{photo credit}

I’ve been cleaning out my gmail inbox, which was a complete nightmare! It is slowly getting better as I file, label, delete and respond. Such a great feeling! I have come across some pretty precious emails, notes of encouragement from when I was sick, ones I read, but never filed away properly. I have to make some sort of scrapbook out of all the amazing words I got from people.

Even after all this time I am still amazed at how God put the perfect note, or song, or person in my life at all the right times to carry me through the hardest times. He continues to do that, but I do find it is harder to see when I have the energy to be busy. I am working on keeping eyes open to see.

I remember the below video. I remember it was a couple days after chemo #2. I was in such a fog that frankly scared me. I couldn’t think clearly. I couldn’t see clearly. I couldn’t walk well. I was weak & nauseous. I remember sitting at the computer desk, staring at the screen, trying to make it focus.

I had a file of songs on hand to play for those valley days, and hit the first one I could find. It was the song below. I remember laying my head on the desk, eyes blurred but not from tears, yet. My head so heavy, my heart, too. I listened to it 3 times at least, it was the perfect song for my heart that day. The desk became wet with my tears, but I was too weary to do much about it.

My Caring Bridge Journal October 6, 2010:

I’m in the valley today. I am weak, sick and in the fog. I woke up last night from at least 6 different dreams where I was telling people I only had months to live, different people each time.

As this linked video says, “I need a voice that is louder than mine” today.

By chemo #3, I figured out that lots of my “fogginess” was side affects from the type of nausea medication I was taking. Once we changed that, it was so much better!

Back to cleaning out my email folders and inbox. I found this short but powerful prayer from my mother in law, Kathy. She sent it to me that same day, October 6, 2010. It was perfect and just what I needed.

Dear Lord,

Hear Amy’s cry and give heed to her prayer. Her heart is faint and her body is weak.Lead her to you… the Rock that is higher than I. You are her refuge, her tower of strength. Let her find comfort in the shelter of Your wings. Amen

from Psalm 61

I pray that if you are in your own valley today, that you too, would find His sweet grace, that His voice would be louder than yours, that you would find shelter in the wings of God! He is the lifter of heads and the healer of hearts. So often He has lifted my head and cradled my heart. He takes our valleys and gives them meaning & purpose. He is a good, good God, one that we can turn to when we just can’t carry on ourselves.

Emotional Health/ Music Renews

In My Head and On My Ipod While Running

I’ve been running.

I used to DESPISE running. It hurt. It hurt my lungs and it hurt my body!

But, now I’m starting to get it. I’m starting to figure out why those who run love to run. I have found that as I have stuck it out and my body has adjusted, that it feels GOOD to run. It is fast and freeing!

I started out very slow. I would jog to get my heart rate up, then just walk fast, until I found my heart rate going down, then I would jog again to get it back up. After treatment last year that it didn’t take much to get my heart rate up, and it has taken a long time for me to be able to run and feel good instead of make me feel faintish & like my lungs were going to explode.

I still hesitate to call myself a runner. I’m not ready to commit to that title, and I still cheat quite a bit. We have hills in our neighborhood, so I walk up the block, and run down it, then walk up the next block and run down it. But boy, when I AM running, it just feels SO GOOD to be able to MOVE and feel alive.

The last 2 times I ran, I had my ipod on shuffle, and BOTH TIMES it started on the song, You Are Everything by Matthew West. It’s not the best song to run to, a bit slow, but the lyrics sure made me smile, especially this part:

And I can’t help but breathe You in, and breathe again
Feeling all this life within
Every single beat of my heart

It is a pretty inspiring lyric to listen to as blood is pumping and feet are going and breath is loud and real and alive. Maybe that is why I have fallen so hard for running, the feeling of being “alive.” Not just alive internally, which I always felt even when sick and weak because of my Jesus, but to also experience it in such a physical way–pretty awesome.

Right after that song, on came Pink, and a song that brought tears for me called ‘Who Knew.’ It is probably about a couple who broke up, but the lyrics made me think of some of the emotions my Todd might feel if I didn’t make it out of my cancer battle.

These thoughts happen once in awhile, I am a changed person and thoughts of eternity and ‘what if’s’ just happen naturally. It is not a bad thing anymore. Not a fearful thing. It keeps life in prospective so I think it is a healthy thing. After a year and a half of being confronted by death, I am prepared for death, for a life of eternity with my Saviour, but I sure don’t want to leave the ones I love. My sorrow would come from knowing the hurt and sadness it would cause those I love. This song reflected those thoughts and made me run harder, pursuing health for my family. They are my motivation to run.

Some of ‘Who Knew’ from Pink:

I’ll keep you locked in my head
Until we meet again
Until we, until we meet again
And I won’t forget you my friend
What happened?

If someone said three years from now
You’d be long gone
I’d stand up and punch them out
Cause they’re all wrong

And that last kiss I’ll cherish
Until we meet again
And time makes it harder
I wish I could remember

But I keep your memory
You visit me in my sleep
My darling, who knew?

That song ends, and I’m running down the hill at dusk, with tears running. I wipe them away and I find myself admiring but distracted by the pink sky. I think it is funny to look at pink while listening to Pink. Between distraction of beauty and tears, I hope I don’t hit a bump and tumble.

The song below comes on. It is by Muse, called Supermassive Black Hole, and then– I REALLY got my run on, throwing caution to the wind. I felt like I was a vampire being chased by a werewolf, or maybe a vampire playing baseball? No, I’m not admitting to being a Twilight fan. At all. But I DID get my run on…and controlled my urge to howl.

That song ends, and I am almost home. I turn off my ipod, take out my earphones, and just listen to the sounds of creation. It is a quiet beautiful. My breath and heart beat join in, and I worship my Creator, and whisper heard words.

I can’t help but breathe You in, and breathe again

Feeling all this life within
Every single beat of my heart

———————–

Matthew West

You Are Everything

I’m the one with two left feet
Standing on a lonely street
I can’t even walk a straight line
And every time you look at me
I’m spinning like an autumn leaf
Bound to hit bottom sometime

Where would I be without someone to save me?
Someone who won’t let me fall

You are everything that I live for
Everything that I can’t believe is happening
You’re standing right in front of me
With arms wide open
All I know is every day is filled with hope
‘Cause You are everything that I breathe for
And I can’t help but breathe You in, and breathe again
Feeling all this life within
Every single beat of my heart

I’m the one with big mistakes
Big regrets and bigger breaks
Than I’d ever care to confess
But You’re the one who looks at me
And sees what I was meant to be
More than just a beautiful mess

You’re everything good in my life
Everything honest and true
And all of those stars hangin’ up in the sky
Could never shine brighter than You

Beauty/ DIY/Crafts/ FUN/DIY

Homemade Natural Lip Balm

There is so much that I love about this little project of Homemade Natural Lip Balm!

~It is easy

~It is natural

~Can be made with no artificial ingredients, colors, preservatives

~It really works!

~It feels great on the lips

~It can be made all organic if you so desire

~It made my girls think I was mom of the year!

The recipe is very simple:

Homemade Natural Lip Balm
click on ingredients to purchase from Amazon –*affiliate links

3 tablespoons Coconut Oil

3 tablespoon Shea Butter

3 tablespoons Cocoa Butter

3 tablespoons Beeswax

~If you want color, add a bit of your favorite lipstick to the mix.

~If you want flavor, add a bit of candy flavoring to the mix.

Put all ingredients into a pan. Melt on low. Spoon into containers. Let set. It takes just minutes, depending on the size of your container, to set up.

I found all the ingredients at one of our local health food stores.

I found our containers at Hobby Lobby.

I found the candy flavoring at Walmart, but I am sure they have it at Hobby Lobby, too.

The containers were found in the art supply section of Hobby Lobby. I was super excited to find the little square containers, but super disappointed when we brought them home. I didn’t realize they were stackables, so we only had 4 lids because I bought 2 packages, there were 2 stacks in each package. That was disappointing, since I thought I was getting about 12 containers with 12 lids. Instead, we have a bunch of leftover, empty containers that stack. Grr.

I am SUPER pleased with how it turned out. I can’t stand paying what health food stores charge for natural lip balm, so I love that I can make it myself.

My girls really got into this and kept saying what a fun project it was. Next time, I will order some containers Amazon, like this Lip Balm Container, and I will skip the flavoring/coloring. The cocoa butter/coconut oil gives such a nice scent, and I like the idea of keeping it super natural. Also, by keeping it natural, you can talk the man in your life out of his yucky Chapstick an into this awesome Natural Lip Balm, minus the girly embellishment on top, of course.

This recipe made quite a bit of lip balm. It makes 12 tablespoons, so if each container contains a tablespoon, that is 12 whole containers of lip balm!

I am planning on storing the lip balm we are not using in the refrigerator. I am not sure if that is necessary, but it may help prolong the life of the lip balm since it is all natural ingredients and no preservatives.

We found cute little embellishments for the tops of our containers and used a glue gun to glue them on. You can also use stickers.

This would be a great fun at a little girls birthday party or a dress up party!

Enjoy!

More From New Nostalgia

Decorating/ FUN/DIY/ HOME/ Kids/Family/ Organizing/ Simplifying

My Thoughts During Spring Break

Having my kids home for spring break has got me wondering…

…about this blog of mine. A hobby– turned passion– turned surprise income maker– now takes time. I now have advertisers, sponsors and write occasional posts on products and get paid for it. I find myself photographer, editor, writer, social media specialist, administrator, and receptionist all at the same time, and I LOVE IT! It has been a huge blessing, a surprise answer to prayer. We asked God about supplementing our income and what would be the best way to do that, and it seems like this blog is the answer. It brings me to tears when I think of the incredible gift I have been given, to spend time doing my passion hobby, and actually help the family income at the same time. I have God and YOU ALL to thank for that.

But, as spring break is here, and kids are home, I find myself wondering how in the world am I going to do it all come summer break? I have felt the pull the last 2 days, the pull between being a mom and being a blog writer. My little ones win in this tug o’ war game. I gladly give in. For you see, I now know that the moments are so precious, and are not forever. They pull, and I respond pulling them to me into arms that don’t ever want to let go. Oh if I could freeze these precious moments!

Arms right now are empty, as I sit here in a few surprise quiet moments, as all 3 of my girls are at a friends house down the street. Thank goodness for great neighbors, another answer to a prayer that we prayed.

Back to summer, I’m not sure how I will balance the two. I know so many of you do it, working mothers, and then those who are my heroes, single mothers. But, I do know that my family must always come first, and I must notice and cling to those moments that so easily slip past when I am too focused on work. I know my work is best when I am being the best mom and wife I can be.

I will probably sneak away to a coffee shop a couple evenings a week and take my laptop to the pool.

Another solution I have is bringing you into our days, sharing with you what we do, and keeping my posts simple. So today, you get to see what my youngest and I have been up to, and I will show you a glimpse of a fun little project we did yesterday with some of our neighbor kids.

I received a phone call from Grandma last night, “Can I take you all out for breakfast in the morning? Can I drop little ones birthday gift off at the house, too?” So our morning started out with the blessing beautiful weather, an awesome breakfast and time with Grandma. Grandma Sharon knew that my little one could really use her own comfy chair in her room, and after looking all over the city, she found the MOST special and comfy one. Such a great gift!

My little ones room has been a mess, and I was hoping this would be the motivation she might need to get her room in order. I was right. As we were out to breakfast, little one asks, “Mom, do you think we could work on my room today, maybe rearrange it and find a special place for my new chair?” Yay! Because I didn’t over schedule our Spring Break, I was able to say “yes” and now her room looks great! She expressed such gratitude to me for helping her with her room, which melted me.

{Here is what was eliminated from her room, most of which was under the bed! Eyyy..}

As always, when I get into one project, it seems like the rest of the house falls apart, so I will take some time this afternoon rescuing my house! The weather is so amazing, I’m thinking it may be a great evening to pack a picnic and have Todd meet us at the park for dinner. It is 81 degrees and sunny, with just a slight breeze. Perfect!

Off I go to get to my rescuing, but before I do, here a quick peek at a super fun project we did yesterday. I will have a “how-to” post coming soon!

Natural Homemade Lip Balm

It was one of our most fun projects, the girls loved it, and I love that it is healthy for them–no chemicals!

Older Posts

Newer Posts