FAMILY/ Kids/Family/ Parenting/ Spiritual

Saturday Morning Summer Musings

It’s a slow Saturday morning. I’m sitting in our sunroom, crossed-legged on the hard porch swing with a fly buzzing around my head. It’s hot and muggy, but the cloud cover and breeze in the trees makes me hope for rain and a bit of respite from the heat.

I woke up thinking about the past week, how summer has me frustratingly busy and unable to find time to write a decent post for this blog. Photos need edited and social channels need updated and I love it all but find myself wanting to post like the old days. The days when I would just type my thoughts and put up a photo with dull lighting and finish feeling satisfied instead of relieved.

This blogging turned job thing is an amazing but interesting blessing. I love taking time to give my best, post with excellence and capture beauty through the lens to share it with you. There is something about working hard to produce good content, to push the publish button, share social content and meet deadlines. I love it and cannot believe I get to call it my job.

But I miss this. This just typing away, unedited blabbing, starting a post without an outline or idea of where it will go or end. How pushing publish can give the same therapeutic feeling I get after spending time with a good friend. I miss it so I’m doing it. Thanks for allowing me, my good friends. I plan to do it more often.

Appointments

There is so much to love about this summer! Comparing it to last summer, well, there really is no comparison. Last summer was filled with doctor appointments, tears, illness and fear. This summer is not perfect, but oh what a difference! Doctor appointments do not consist of issues dealing with life or death. There are still appointments, but they are normal and for my teens. Orthodontist for brace tightening. dermatologist to keep teenage acne at bay, dentist for cleanings and optometrist for replacing teen’s lost glasses for the THRID TIME (insert sigh and eye roll here.) Life is still busy and the calendar full, but it is a bearable busy and I’m grasping to hold on to all these fleeting, beautiful moments.

Teen Driver

This holding of moments is intensified because I now have a teen driver who is working all of the time! What a relief it has been for me to have a driver, and a responsible one at that. My Teagan walks out the door daily and I watch her back and wonder when my baby became a beauty that sprouted wings and is soaring. Her summer is spent watching and keeping others safe while lifeguarding in a red tank top with a cross on it, and nannying 3 littles on her ‘off’ days. She is scent of sunscreen, sun-kissed hair in a bun, whistle around her neck, Bible and journal in her bag –just in case she gets a few minutes of quiet. She is laughter with friends often bringing them home unexpectedly to entertain and kick us out of the basement mid-movie so that she can connect and socialize. My baby is beauty and I’m missing her already and she has not even flown away yet.

Camp

My Middle went last week, took a friend and had a blast meeting more. My Youngest goes this coming week and I am excited for the fun she will have. I’m ready for the longing I will have for her to come home that creeps up about 2 days before she is due. With Oldest working all day and another at camp, I get focused time with the one left. This is a new blessing, a quieter house with just one to love on. I’m looking forward to the week and purposefully kept my calendar as empty as possible.

Construction

Everyone should have a Cory in the family. He is my hard-working brother-in-law who teaches during the school year and constructs during the summer. His work is seen all over our home, from the swings in our backyard, to our porch, porch railing, drywall in basement, a new kitchen–the list goes on. Last year he gutted our failing kitchen and created a new one that I smile at daily. I have yet to share it with you all but I will! This year he is tearing down old siding and putting up new. It is a gift to have him around. I learn from watching him, he teaches while constructing, showing by example what quality and hard work looks like. His hammering starts most mornings at 7:30, it is a familiar routine that brings a surprising comfort instead of intrusion. I sit and have my coffee, toast and journaling/prayer time with the background music of a saw and hammer. It pushes me to start my day and continue on, working hard with a servant’s heart, just like Cory.

Swimming

Grandpa and Grandma have a pool. The are amazingly generous and let the family use it. They have a pool house which is very convenient; we don’t have to intrude with our wet suits into their home. They set up a family google pool calendar which allows us to reserve it and share it with others. This has been going on since my 13-year-old was 3 and I still can’t get used to the gift that is. We’ve made so many memories there, and each summer more are created.

Flexibility

I am learning this. I love a schedule and predictability, which is probably why I find comfort in early summer morning sounds of tools. I love knowing what to expect. Summer is always a challenge for me to adjust from a schedule to none, especially now that I am a work-at-home Mom. I’m learning to let go of expectations and roll with the punches. I’m learning that parenting teens means being available when needed but letting go and letting wings spread at the same time. I’m learning there is little to no predictability when it comes to teens and summer.

Today I thought my Oldest would be life-guarding all day and my Middle would be with friends all day & I would have a full day at home to do whatever I want until a family wedding tonight. At the beginning of this post I wished for rain and it came and caused both of my girls plans to change. I stopped this post right in the middle of talking about the family swimming pool to rescue my girl from the farmer’s market crowds and rain. I drove with bedhead and in shorts and my Todd’s t-shirt, my slow morning became fast & off I went. It might be uncomfortable at times to release my schedule, doing whatever I want, and babes who are becoming beauties, but really, is it? It all depends on my perspective. When I think of what could be and what is, I’m so very thankful. Thankful for life, for family, for summer days that bring sun or rain, and for you–my good friends who let me share about it.

Decorating/ FAMILY/ Homemade Gifts/ Kids/Family/ Sponsored

Office Makeover Surprise For Father’s Day With Snapfish

I recently surprised my husband Todd for Father’s Day and made over his work office. I had the help of fun personalized photo gifts from Snapfish.

My Todd spends much of his time serving and giving to others, especially to our girls. He works at a non-profit organization helping under-resourced youth & then comes home and is the most hands-on Dad with our 3 teen girls. There is a lot of estrogen in our house and he embraces every moment– especially the dramatic ones–and brings a beautiful calm.

I wanted to do something super special for him to honor him on Father’s Day and to thank him for being such an amazing Dad to our 3 girls. He is the best example of the modern dad who is engaged with his kids, redefining what being a great dad looks like. I know he is so proud of his girls and is going to love showing the world that by displaying it in his office. The only thing close to decor that was in his office before I tackled it was one small picture of his girls, so I knew he would really like being surrounded with more photos of wonderful family memories.

I asked for the keys to his office and told him not to ask questions. I like getting bossy like that. I loaded my car with a hammer, nails, a few select decor items, and my personalized Father’s Day photo gifts from Snapfish, and drove to his office after-hours.

I started by hanging the above wood panel that I created on Snapfish with a photo from one of Todd’s favorite places on earth–Universal Studios. I love this captured memory of Todd and the girls walking down the street toward fake studio buildings. I love that it captures movement and the backpack that Todd insisted on carrying the whole trip–my sweet gentleman husband! It shows us wearing matching, made for comfort shoes, something that would never happen now that my girls are teens & too cool to match Mom & Dad!

Snapfish allows you to make one-of-a-kind gifts & embellish your photos with just a click. I kept it simple with this wood panel. I used a small background black rectangle, faded it so the image could come through a bit, and added text saying “BEST DAD” on top of it in white.

Here are examples of what you can do:

Photos: Upload pictures from your device, Facebook, or Instagram.
Layout: Layouts vary per product, so check out what is available for each
Designs: Pre-designed templates make it easy to create. Edit and switch out designs to your liking.
Backgrounds: Select colors, patterns, or designs as a background
Embellishments: Hundreds of cute embellishments, sassy sayings, and themed collections
Text: Add phrases that help caption the moment.

I also made a personalized aluminum photo panel that sits upright on his desktop. This is the coolest! It is a super thin & modern metal panel, and looks great with the round silver platter I put on his desk to gather his supplies.

I chose one of my favorite photos of Todd and the girls when they were little. We were at the lake standing on a dock and were about to go on some paddle boats. I remember it like it was yesterday! Look at their curls! Look at how happy they are with their Daddy! Look how little Avery hugs his leg! Be still my heart…so precious.

I added a pendent-type overlay embellishment to this one, and chose a text template that says “Dad,we love YOU.” It was already created, I just had to drag and drop. So easy!

I spent some time organizing his bookshelf & added a plastic plant & grey storage box at the top. Fake greenery is good as my Todd does not have a green thumb! I put a second silver platter on a middle shelf and put his water bottle & some supplies that will be within arms reach from his office chair.

I added another brown storage bin at the top of his tall file cabinet with a gold himmeli that I handmade. I also hung up a bulletin board that had been leaning against the wall on the floor for a couple of months.

I added a plastic but pretty green succulent to his desktop and put some pens into a personalized photo mug, also made on Snapfish. I made two mugs for him, one to store pens and one to drink out of. I added a heart embellishment to one of them and font to both of them. So much fun!

{for your pinning pleasure}

Todd went to work the next day and walked into his office to find my surprise. He loved it. He told me “everywhere I look I see family. I’m surrounded by family & I love it.” Aww! I love HIM!

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WOULD YOU LIKE TO MAKE YOUR OWN SNAPFISH PERSONALIZED GIFTS?

Check out all the cool photo gift options at Snapfish and enter to win one of thirty-five $50 Snapfish codes below!

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18+, US Residents Only and only one winner per household. Winners will be selected and notified by Clever Girls and/or Snapfish by Friday, June 17th. Good Luck!

I was selected for this opportunity as a member of Clever Girls and the content and opinions expressed here are all my own.

FAMILY/ Featured/ Kids/Family/ Parenting

3 Reasons Why You Should Let Your Teenager Have A Messy Room

I have 3 teenage girls, and I am super surprised that as a parent, I am at peace with all 3 of them having a messy room. Does this mean their rooms are always messy? Well, honestly it depends on their personalities. They all 3 eventually get to a point where they can’t stand the mess anymore and give into choosing to pick it up. But that time frame differs for each of my girls, depending on how organized they like to be & how they are wired. I have been shocked at times to see how long it can take for them to get to the point of picking up their room!

My pastor is the one who is responsible for the peace I have found in just shutting their doors and moving on. I am so glad I was there the Sunday he talked about parenting and gave some practical tips. I don’t remember much from that sermon, accept the tip that surprised me the most, and that was to allow your teenager to have a messy room.

3 Reasons Why It is OK For Teens To Have a Messy Room:

It Is A Place For Them To Just BE

This was the main reason he gave for letting your teen have a messy room, and the one that really hit home with me. He said that in this day and age our teenagers are under immense pressure to perform, everywhere they go. Social media has taken this to the extreme, where teens are constantly feeling the pressure to be ‘on’ & to present the best of themselves to the world. Presenting self authentically in such a public space is something I talk about often with my girls, recognizing it is a hard thing to grasp for adults, much less for a teenager.

I love this tip that my pastor gave, to give teens a space in this world that they can call theirs, where they can totally exhale and be who they are with no pressure to perform. What better place to do this than in their own bedrooms?

FAMILY/ Featured/ Kids/Family

A Family Update

{photo taken by Jenna Spurlin}

I recently wrote a post titled My Journey From Hobby Blogger to Influencer, and talked about how this blog is my recipe binder, my memory keeper, my cancer journal & a place to connect with such a great and caring community. It has certainly become something very special to me and my family over the years. It is especially comforting as a 2-time cancer survivor that my words and our memories are in a place where my 3 girls could easily access them and know the things I think about and am passionate about.

This post is one that I am writing just to capture this season in life. I find myself with 3 teenage daughters and I wonder where the time has gone? When did this happen?

I don’t write as often about my girls now that they are teens. It is a delicate thing, letting their stories be THEIR stories & not oversharing. I will be doing a dance with this delicate sharing in some upcoming posts where I will write about a teen parenting class I have been taking. It has been so good and has really helped me embrace these years and realize just how wonderful they can be.

But for now, I’m just going to share these family photos with you and try to take a ‘word snapshot’ of my 3 lovlies and their sweet lives.

{photo taken by Jenna Spurlin}

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Teagan

My firstborn. My overachiever. My hard worker. My heart. You can find her most nights leaning over textbooks with pens, pencils, a water bottle & snacks diligently studying. She is 16 & a sophomore in high school, is a cross-country runner, & is super involved as a leader in her youth group. She has always chosen great friends to hang out with & is wise beyond her years. She is very self-aware, knows her strengths and weaknesses, has a beautiful thinking brain, does not like a lot of emotional fluff, & finds humor in so many things. She usually has a smile on her face and I marvel how it rarely goes away…she has this amazing ability to smile even while talking. It is her default face and it is beautiful. I find myself trying to hang on to every moment, as I know we only have a couple of years left with our girl.

Colsie

She is my red-haired beauty & my hero at age 15. Life has given her some great obstacles the last few years but she has come through them with grit, perseverance and a resilience that I am just in awe of. She is incredibly creative and musical and has a love for instruments including the violin, guitar & piano. She has a soft heart that cares for others. She is very in tune with the emotions of others and will be the first to ask “are you ok?” when she senses something is wrong. She, too, has a wonderful friend group & is truly a great friend to others. I have always called her my creative, caring, kind, quirky Colsie & even as a teenager she still is all that! She will frown at that ‘quirky’ word, but I love that she is unique and delights in things that are not always mainstream. Case in point? She is going ‘hammocking’ with a friend after school today. She saved money to purchase this awesome portable hammock, (affiliate link) and she and her friends will just take their hammocks and ‘hang out.’ It cracks me up. They are also going to take some photos while at the park, as Colsie is a very gifted photographer.

Avery

Avery is 13 and in middle school. The strong will that we saw when she was young has chilled out into something so wonderful. She is the perfect balance of soft and strong. It is quite remarkable to watch. She is a very determined, gifted and self-motivated student, a great soccer player despite the challenges that having asthma brings, is a super talented baker & loves watching recorded tv with her Dad. She is not one who needs a ton of friends. She is a good friend to a select few, and truly just loves being at home with her family and ipod. She is a friendly introvert. She gets that beauty is fleeting, even at a young age, and I wonder if she knows how beautiful she really is? She is a bit of a tom-boy, but one who always has her nails polished with quite impressive DIY designs. She plays the piano & usually practices without needing a reminder. Avery loves one-on-one conversation and will often come sit on my bed in the evening just to talk, or will become quite chatty at the breakfast table each morning, which makes me smile. She lives for holidays, as they give her an excuse to bake something great or come up with awesome gifts for those she loves. She also values family, as her favorite place to be is at her Grandparents house, jumping on the trampoline with her cousins.

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So there are my girls in a nutshell, at this stage in life. Notice there is much positive and no negative, which is not reflective of how it really is. Yes, there is so much beauty and positive, but there IS a reason I’m taking a teen parenting class! The teens years can be hard as kids are discovering who they are and parents are learning how they must parent differently, and how to let go. There are personality differences which can create much static and drama, especially with 3 girls! We are not the perfect family, so far from it…but I do feel like we are all learning how to love well & I know God will continue to show us how to do that, despite all of our differences & shortcomings. This is my daily prayer. We have come through a lot together & I celebrate that!

I have to mention my man before closing this family update.

My Todd.

Steadfast, loyal, loving, wise. He serves all of us ‘girls’ with humility & consistency. We all know we are his priority & that he would do anything for us. He spends his days working hard for our family and never complains. He is in full-time ministry and does work every day that is meaningful and makes a difference. He lives for family nights and junk food on the weekends, and the occasional date night with ME. I am a very, very blessed woman and I’m so thankful to call him mine!

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If you have made it to the end, then I must thank you for reading this. I am so very thankful for this space to record things that matter to me, and the fact that you come along with me in that means the world to me! Thanks for reading New Nostalgia!

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What about you? Are you a parent to teens? What are you learning? Got any tips for me?

Beauty/ FAMILY/ Parenting

Real Beauty, Fake Beauty

from Dove.com

For Valentines Day, we got our girls gift cards to Clair’s jewelry and accessories. We didn’t buy them very much candy this year, so we thought a $5 gift card would be fun for them.

They loved it! We spent almost an hour in that little store as they decided what to buy. We really got lucky, they had 80% off their clearance items, so that small gift card was able to purchase quite a bit!

Makeup (along with hair accessories and jewelry) was chosen by all 3 of them- glistening lip gloss and shimmery eye shadow.

They have had much fun playing dress up, and my oldest has even left the house with a bit of shimmer on her eyelids. I thought about demanding she go wash her face, but it was just a hint of shimmer, so I let it go. Later I decided that for us, this was a molehill, not a mountain. (heavy black eyeliner would be a mountain:))

Instead of getting all uptight about them using makeup, I stayed pretty relaxed about it. I wanted to see if they would be responsible and figure out the line of what is appropriate and what is not, on their own.

They have really done a great job, and I am very proud. My younger 2 have been playing dress-up much more than usual with their new purchases, and my oldest has been experimenting with different shades and layering, which makes me smile to see the artist in her.

She has come to me and asked, “mom, is this too dark? can you see it? is it appropriate?” The makeup they chose is made for kids, so the pigment is very light and see-through, so it has not been a problem.

What it has done is open up some beautiful conversations about—beauty!

We have a saying in our home that is often repeated in various ways. They go something like this:

*”What matters most is the inside”

* “It’s the insides that matter”

* “What do your insides look like right now, are they as pretty as your outside?” and…

*”AHHH! I can’t even look!! AHHH! your insides!!!”

(must say this dramatically, while squeezing eyes shut, when insides are not too pretty, which usually gets a giggle and then there is beauty again.)

My girls have heard me say these phrases so many times! When I can tell they feel beautiful and are flaunting it, I tell them how pretty they look and many times follow it up with, “but..do the insides matter or the outsides?”

I even hear them ask each other that question while playing “dress-up.” Pretty cute.

My oldest has been fun to watch lately. She loves fashion and likes to look unique. She works with very little clothing, (most of which comes from thrift stores or garage sales) and is able to make great outfits, some I would never think to put together!

I love to see her express what her idea of beauty is, and I love that it doesn’t always follow the crowd. I try hard to let her be who God made her to be and keep my focus on what her heart is telling me, instead of getting wrapped up in what I would want her to wear. As long as she is modest and age-appropriate, I’m a happy mom.

We have been having some deeper conversations about beauty, and I’ve let her watch the videos dove.com videos of a natural looking model being transformed into a flawless runway model, all done by computer, and not reality.

I want to give her a realistic view of what is beautiful, and how the world can distort beauty and tries very hard to redefine what is beautiful.

We talked about how God is the ultimate artist who created us all to be different and unique, and how the world’s message says “everyone needs to look a certain way to be ok,” which is a lie.

Lightbulbs went off as she watched. She was fascinated by the artistic side of what computers are capable of doing, and also seemed to “get it.”

At the end of the first one, she said “she isn’t even ‘her’ anymore” which was the perfect opportunity to talk about how we can lose who we really are if we are too focused on our outsides.

It was a bit deep for her, but I know it was one more time to let truth sink into her little brain, even if it was just a nugget.

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