Emotional Health/ FAMILY/ Music Renews/ Spiritual

When Grief Hits

Grief.

It is a word my counselor used at the end of our first session, “I see someone who is grieving.”

2015 was a year of grieving. It was a year I lost my voice and this blog took a bit of a standstill, which had not happened since I started it back 2007.

CS Lewis says of grief in A Grief Observed:

“No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear. I’m not afraid, but the sensation is like being afraid. The same fluttering of the stomach, the same restlessness, the yearning. I keep on swallowing.

Other times it feels like being mildly drunk or confused. There is sort of an invisible blanket between the world and me.

I find it hard to take in what anyone says. Or perhaps hard to want to take it in. It is so uninteresting yet I want others to be about me. I dread the moments when the house is empty. If only they would talk to one another & not me.”

This puts words to what I was feeling. Grief brought on anxiety and the enemy ran with it. I lost who I was as I became a person with no words to type.

I felt like another person as my introverted self who was used to craving moments of a quiet, empty home now felt lost, I didn’t know what to do in the silence.

I was coming out of grief after years of fighting cancer and multiple surgeries and medications and all the loss that it brings. I was embracing what it was to live new.

But then my hardest of hard grief hit, grief over our sweet daughter whose story took an unexpected and abrupt turn and hit extra hard due to her young age.

Her story is her story and will not be told in full here, but illness of her own took over our girl and she was not recognizable to us, or herself. A severity of illness, taking us all by surprise, and into a battle that felt much harder than my previous cancer battle.

Mess with me, I can deal, at least so far. Mess with my precious baby, and I battled hard to stay strong through her battle, but in the end, anxiety sank me.

I wrote about the sinking here, and along with my prolonged anxiety, I found also found myself in a pool of sadness, swimming in grief. Anxiety and depression can often go hand in hand.

I am acquainted with anxiety, but never of that severity & had not experienced it accompanied with depression. Deep sadness was a new experience for me.

Together anxiety and depression are a brutal duet that brought my life music & happiness to a halt. It was survival time. I was a survivor learning what survival really meant.

Ecclesiastes says there is a time for everything. A time to weep. A time for grief.

Those months of grieving in 2015 were long and hard. I look back and remember the tears that would just appear sudden and silent, falling down my cheeks anytime I would hear the words “how are you?” My mouth would open but tears would replace words and I would try to answer but mostly kept silent & went inward.

I could not hold the flow back. It was not a sobbing type of tear, but a quiet, constant flow that would just come whenever I would try to speak of my inward pain–which was almost never–unless someone asked those 3 words “how are you?”

The words would be asked and there were the brave that would continue to come toward and were able to get me to talk even while tears flowed. I remember the saltiness of tears tasted when I would open my mouth and speak.

I remember the relief I felt after months passed, medications were found, and I could speak without the saline taste of tears.

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens….a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance… Ecclesiastes 3:1,4

I think of the song, the one below:

Turn Turn Turn

A time to be born, a time to die
A time to plant, a time to reap
A time to kill, a time to heal
A time to laugh, a time to weep

A time to build up, a time to break down
A time to dance, a time to mourn
A time to cast away stones, a time to gather stones together

This summer, 2016, for me, has been one of dancing & laughing, but I will not soon forget what it is to mourn & grieve. I know God bottles our tears & will not waste a single one.

I know there is meaning and purpose in pain when one knows the kindness of their Maker & chooses to turn their tear-stained face to Him.

God and His promises were the only lasting hope I could find while grieving, and it was one that held. I was held.

Are you grieving? Know that Your Maker loves you so very much, and holds you and your tears, too.

Remember: there is a time for everything, and as the world turns so does everything and relief will come as all turns, turns, turns. Remember while in the spinning He’s got the whole world and YOU in His hands.

{Turn, Turn, Turn by The Byrds}

Update: Since writing this post, I have learned that a sweet friend’s cancer has returned & I find myself reading these words I wrote about grief and thinking hers.

Yes, this is a summer of dancing for me, but I still and enter into the spinning grief of others, for we are made to mourn with those who mourn and I do. My heart is so sad for her.

Will you pray for my sweet friend? She has 2 young kids and wants to see them grow up. I won’t share her name here but God knows it and when you speak of her and lift her up to Him. I would be so appreciative if you do.

…………..

More From New Nostalgia:

Severe Anxiety Symptoms – Words From My Journal

14 Ways To Find Relief From Severe Anxiety

Top 5 Ways To Relieve Stress

Going There–Mental Illness

PMDD Seeking Treatment

Emotional Health/ FAMILY/ Spiritual

14 Ways I Found Relief From Severe Anxiety

About a week ago, I wrote a post titled Severe Anxiety Symptoms – Words From My Journal. The response I received from this post has been big and I’ve spent the week reading so many of your precious, personal stories.

Thank you for sharing with me and letting me know that the post mattered, that telling my story allows you to feel less alone in yours. You share with me and I in turn, also feel less alone. There are many of us in this together. In fact, anxiety disorders are the most common mental illness in the U.S., affecting 40 million adults in the United States age 18 and older, or 18% of the population. (Source: National Institute of Mental Health)

There are so many who can relate to the pain that anxiety can bring, and often anxiety can lead to depression or visa versa, for these two often go hand in hand. One can trigger the other.

I read and heard your stories of both depression and anxiety.

A dear one wrote, “I am on the bed right now, nauseated , heart pounding, trembling, etc.” She shares her heart and mine breaks for her. I’ve been in that place.

When you want to just curl up in a ball and stay in bed all day please know that there is hope. When your hearts feels like it is pounding out of your chest and you really don’t know why, know that there is hope. When you feel alone, know that you are not.

I will share a few ways that I found relief from my severe anxiety. I pray that some of these suggestions can help bring hope and help to someone else.

14 Ways I Found Relief From Anxiety

Know God’s Got You

~Know that there is a place where you can lift your eyes & where I continue lift mine. You are never alone, God will help you & He can turn ashes into beauty.

“I lift my eyes up….my help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven & earth.” Psalm 121:1-2

“God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.” Psalm 46:1

“To provide for them that mourn…to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the LORD, that he might be glorified.” Isaiah 61:3

Ask For Wisdom

~I prayed constantly for wisdom in searching for answers for my severe anxiety. God led me to answers, slowly but surely. It was in His time, not mine.

Tell Someone

~tell a trusted friend, a medical doctor, a therapist, a psychologist or psychiatrist.

I did all of the above. I was desperate for help and answers, and the more support in finding those answers, the better. It took all of those people I listed above to get to the answers I needed. You never know who and what God is going to use to bring relief to your suffering.

{Example: It was a medical doctor, an OB to be exact, that had an answer to my morning nausea & weight loss. As we were trying to figure out what was causing my severe morning nausea, she gave me a medication specifically for women with morning sickness, one that is taken the night before. This was a key step to stabilizing me & helping me wake up steadily instead of waking up to heaves of nausea due to my severe anxiety. It allowed me to eat early in the day, which was huge as nutrition was another key to getting better. I took this medication for about 3 months, long enough for me to stabilize and for us to figure out my physical symptoms were not due to cancer returning but to severe anxiety.}

One of the most precious gifts to me during this time having a dear, MOST trusted friend. One that had walked a similar road. We used Voxer app and talked daily. It was so healthy to talk to someone who would love and accept me no matter what, someone who could handle my tears as they flowed freely while I talked. Find that someone and be willing to open up to them. I you don’t have someone like that, pray that God would provide someone for you.

Pursue Help

As stated above, one of the key things I did to get healthy again was to pursue help. I brought in as many professionals as I could. I went to many, many appointments, as I knew that there was an answer but it was not just going to come to me. Because of my cancer history, we had to rule out recurrence, so the number of my appointments and tests were overwhelming, but I continued on. I pressed on and pursued help for the sake of my family & because I had faith that God would lead me to what I needed. It was miserable to go when I was feeling so unwell,and I hated spending my summer in doctors offices, but it paid off in the end. There is help out there! Pursue it, and if you can’t, ask a loved one to help you pursue it.

Be Open To Medication

If your symptoms are severe, you will probably need medication, even if for a short time. I am not a professional, obviously, but please see a professional if you cannot seem to get to a healthy place on your own. I cannot tell you what a blessing medication has been to me. I do not know where I would be without it. It is a gift and one that I do not take for granted.

Just Do The Next Thing

There were so many days where I just felt so miserable and couldn’t think straight. I had nothing to give. I was too miserable to lay in bed but too miserable to do anything either, at least that is how it seemed. My new mantra during that time was “Just Do The Next Thing.” Most of the time, the next thing was as simple as getting up.

I remember just getting up and standing by my bed, and then thinking and talking myself through what came next.

“Just Do The Next Thing.”

Make my bed.

“Just Do The Next Thing.”

Get dressed.

“Just Do The Next Thing.”

Take the girls to school.

“Just Do The Next Thing.”

Dishes in dishwasher and throw a load of laundry in.

“Just Do The Next Thing.”

Drive the girls to the pool.

“Just Do The Next Thing.”

Get self to a doctor appointment.”

“Just Do The Next Thing.”

Eat even though you lack appetite.

By just doing the next thing, I got through my days and eventually got through the summer and eventually got the answers I needed.

Do What is Necessary

Do what is necessary, and if you can, do a little more, but keep it minimal and simple.

I was in survival mode, but I still had to live for those I love. I am a survivor & fighter, and this was by far the hardest season for me, even including fighting cancer. Anxiety kicked me hard, but I still had to be a Mom & Wife, even when I was sick everyday. My minimal looked like the “Just Do The Next Thing” above. Getting dressed, dishes, laundry, meals for my family (super simple meals), blog when I could, & then rest. Baby steps and one foot in front of the other. I felt I was trudging through quicksand most days, but if I stopped, I would sink. Motion is a must when it comes to anxiety and depression, even if super slow motion.

Keep Trying Different Options

If what you are doing is not working, try something else. I had to try several medications before finding the right one. I had to go off all of my cancer meds to see if that was what was causing my physical symptoms and weight loss. It took time and persistence. I tried at least 4 different mood meds. Eventually, it was an anti-nausea medication and an anti-anxiety medication that worked. In the past, I took an anti-depressant, and for some reason that did not work and what my body needed was purely an anti-anxiety medication. If I did not keep trying different options, I would have never found an answer.

Know That Talk Therapy is as Important as Medication

I was very thankful to be able to see a therapist and talk through what I was experiencing that the time. This was super helpful, even when at the beginning I could barely articulate what I was feeling and just ended up with tears streaming. Those early sessions I did a lot of listening and nodding. I eventually got to the point where I could talk and it was super helpful. My therapist watched me become a different person as I found the right medication, and then she walked me through the healing process, as she knew that now I was stable and could hear what she was saying and talk through the trauma of it all.

Can’t afford therapy? I understand. Mine was gifted to me. There are other options. A great one is one I have recently found and followed. His name is John Cordray and he calls himself the Calm Expert. He is a licensed therapist and has great wisdom. There is an option to hire him, but he also gives great free advice on his YouTube & Periscope channel.

Eat When You Can

Nutrition is so important. I lost 20 pounds in less than 7 weeks. It was not pretty. It scared me. I didn’t have an appetite and had nausea all day until early evening. I was not able to take supplements, and I believe this was a huge part of my downward spiral. I was not nourished and there are so many vitamins and minerals that are vital for brain health.

B vitamins, Omega’s, Vitamin D, Probiotics, Multi-Vitamin, Magnesium & Zinc are all examples of what I take now and are huge for mental health, but I could not tolerate them when I was in the midst of severe anxiety. Again, it took medication for me to become stable, regain my appetite, lose the nausea and be able to tolerate supplements.

Surround Yourself with Comfort

A cozy blanket, a cup of tea, soft music, candlelight. These things seem small, but even the smallest bit of comfort helps when anxiety is taking over.

Exercise

I know, I know. It seems impossible. At times it was. I can’t speak too much on this subject as I still continue to struggle with it, but I KNOW walking makes a huge difference in my day. Simple, even slow walking gets you out and moving, and is beneficial, especially in the sunshine.

Push Truth to Your Brain

This one was huge for me. I knew I had to replace fear, worries & lies with truth. I knew I had to keep my faith as strong as possible. I did this by reading, by listening to podcasts, and by watching YouTube videos.

The Bible was key for me, as my personal belief is that it has the power to transform. I use the YouVersion Bible app on my phone and followed plans specifically for anxiety and hope.

Jesus Calling–another app on my phone that I read everyday. A small snippet of truth that would get me through the day.

Switch On Your Brain-a book (affiliate link) that I read that was so good that it is on my list to read again.

Journaling the Psalms– I wrote a post about this when I was at the tail-end of my severe anxiety. It details what it is and how I did it, & how it helped change me.

Affirmations–a dear friend sent me daily affirmations on cards that she has. I will be creating similar cards soon to share on the blog.

Podcasts--even while laying there, miserable, one can listen to a podcast. I highly recommend Daily Hope With Rick Warren & listen to it often while on a walk or doing housework. I also love listening to my own pastor, Pastor Bryan Clark of Lincoln Berean Church

Know That There Will Be An End

Never lose hope. Know that there are answers. Know that with God all things are possible. Ask Him for help, for He is the Ultimate help in trouble and calls Himself our Comforter.

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. 2 Corinthians 1:3-4

…………..

I hope this list helps. I will continue to share bits of my journal here at New Nostalgia & continue talking about anxiety. I think it is so important to talk about as so many are suffering.

What about you? Have you ever had anxiety? Depression?

If you are comfortable sharing, I would love to know your story & what has helped you.

………

Severe Anxiety Symptoms – An Excerpt From My Journal

Top 5 Ways To Relieve Stress

……….

Disclaimer:

NEVER DISREGARD MEDICAL ADVICE OR DELAY SEEKING MEDICAL CARE BECAUSE OF SOMETHING YOU HAVE READ ON OR ACCESSED THROUGH THIS WEB SITE.

Emotional Health/ FAMILY

Severe Anxiety Symptoms – Words From My Journal

I’ve written a bit here at New Nostalgia about mental illness and my story of anxiety. It was about this time last year when severe anxiety symptoms were taking over my world and I had no idea what it really was. I had dealt with anxiety in the past, but I didn’t know what severe anxiety felt like, as it can feel different for every person. It manifested itself for me in physical symptoms, and with my Stage 3 breast cancer history, these symptoms brought on a fear that my cancer was back. It was all very confusing. I was sick and I didn’t know why.

After spending most of the last summer getting test after test, poked, prodded and scanned; and after coming off hormone-blocking cancer meds, detoxing from mood meds, & trying several different anti-depressants, we finally found an answer. My doctor decided to try a specific anti-anxiety medication, and I felt better almost immediately. I am so thankful that I am still in remission and am finding my way back to optimal health.

My therapist had me write about what it felt like it in my journal, which was quite therapeutic, but I have never shared those writings until now. It was all just too raw and I needed time to heal before telling this part of my story.

My hope is that in the telling, it will create awareness & help someone else who is experiencing the same type of confusing symptoms that I was. There is hope & answers in the midst of severe anxiety!

My Severe Anxiety Symptoms

Journal Entry 2015

Heart palpitations, a feeling of adrenaline pumping out of control. The feeling one gets when they are about to take the stage in front of large crowd. Stomach nervous, breathing erratic, heart pounding, nervousness. Butterflies in my stomach, a not-so-nice fluttering.

Lying on the couch, in the middle of a television show, minding my own business. Out of nowhere, I feel an uncomfortable flutter & stomach tightening. I was all of a sudden a ball of nerves with no reason to be nervous. Baffling. My Todd watching TV next to me and has no idea my inward struggle. It would come on so quickly. I take deep breaths in order to find equilibrium & calm.

It never worked.

I jolt awake in the morning and before I have the chance to think a thought I have nausea and a feeling of dread. It just comes, or actually, is just there to greet me, waiting until my eyes open and my brain is aware of, well, nothing really, except that I feel so ill.

Nausea before I am vertical. I deep breathe and wonder what it is that I am so on edge about, besides feeling sick before the day even begins.

It is like I am hyper-alert. I dread anyone needing anything from me. The phone buzzes telling me of a text and I jump. Every. Time. My body responds like this to odd things, automatically, in ways I can’t control. My mind thinks “oh no” & I look at my phone like “WHAT?” I don’t want anyone to want anything from me. There is no overflow. Dealing with myself has overwhelmed the overflow.

I want to sleep in but the nausea is so intense that I just lay in misery. I am aware of my swallowing my own saliva & dread the next swallow as even that brings on nausea. Brushing my teeth in the morning is a chore, I hate it, the awful taste of toothpaste. Making lunches for my girls is torturous. The smell of peanut butter sends me into the bathroom. I heave. Always dry, of which I am thankful, but I heave and tears stream mixed with leftover mascara from the night before. I look into the mirror and see bloodshot eyes & hollow dark circles staring back at me.

Appetite has disappeared, it is amazing how much I miss it. I am a foodie, a lover of food. What will I blog about? How will I feed my family? Meal planning is impossible when everything sounds nauseating.

I find relief from nausea by late afternoon most days. I try to make up for calories lost, and in the evening eat as much as I can.

My frame is wasting away. I drop 20 pounds in 2 months. My thighs are skin and bone. I don’t like how they look. Chicken legs.

Even through 4 months of chemo I did not lose this much weight or feel this constant sickness.

What is wrong with me?

{Last summer, with my sweet Colsie girls, a brave smile…and my chicken legs.}

………………..

I’m so thankful I found answers, that it is a new year and I’ve gained that 20 pounds back.

I will share more of my journal entries & my anxiety story in upcoming posts.

Update: See “14 Ways I Found Relief From Severe Anxiety“

………………..

Can you relate? Have you ever had anxiety manifest itself in physical symptoms? Did you know right away that what you were feeling was anxiety? Have you found answers?

FAMILY/ Featured/ Kids/Family/ Parenting

3 Reasons Why You Should Let Your Teenager Have A Messy Room

I have 3 teenage girls, and I am super surprised that as a parent, I am at peace with all 3 of them having a messy room. Does this mean their rooms are always messy? Well, honestly it depends on their personalities. They all 3 eventually get to a point where they can’t stand the mess anymore and give into choosing to pick it up. But that time frame differs for each of my girls, depending on how organized they like to be & how they are wired. I have been shocked at times to see how long it can take for them to get to the point of picking up their room!

My pastor is the one who is responsible for the peace I have found in just shutting their doors and moving on. I am so glad I was there the Sunday he talked about parenting and gave some practical tips. I don’t remember much from that sermon, accept the tip that surprised me the most, and that was to allow your teenager to have a messy room.

3 Reasons Why It is OK For Teens To Have a Messy Room:

It Is A Place For Them To Just BE

This was the main reason he gave for letting your teen have a messy room, and the one that really hit home with me. He said that in this day and age our teenagers are under immense pressure to perform, everywhere they go. Social media has taken this to the extreme, where teens are constantly feeling the pressure to be ‘on’ & to present the best of themselves to the world. Presenting self authentically in such a public space is something I talk about often with my girls, recognizing it is a hard thing to grasp for adults, much less for a teenager.

I love this tip that my pastor gave, to give teens a space in this world that they can call theirs, where they can totally exhale and be who they are with no pressure to perform. What better place to do this than in their own bedrooms?

FAMILY/ HOME/ Kids/Family/ Simplifying

Everyday Family Dinner Buffet- Style

{breakfast for dinner -local organic eggs, whole -wheat french toast, nitrate-free bacon & green smoothies }

If you follow me on Instagram, you already know I am a big fan of serving up our everyday family dinners buffet- style. It has been fun to share some pics of our simple family dinners with you. It sure is easy to quick grab my phone, snap an insta photo & post it. I get so much inspiration on Instagram and love having a place to gather and share our everyday moments.

{kale & lentil salad with coconut bacon, coconut crusted chicken, mango dipping sauce & pineapple}

Serving Dinner

I don’t know about you, but setting the table can get old and monotonous, especially on busy nights where just getting a simple homemade dinner in the mouths of my loved ones is a feat in itself. I have 3 teenage girls who often are coming and going, even at dinnertime, so it is nice to just set out a stack of plates, utensils, & cups; then quick set out the food for each family member to help themselves.

Oftentimes we ARE able to sit at the table and eat together, and even on these nights, I still like to have everyone come in the kitchen to help themselves buffet-style, then carry their plate, fork, napkin and self-filled cup to the table. I have a small glass table in our kitchen that is perfect for setting out food buffet-style, and a larger table in our dining room where we have room to sit and eat as a family.

Why Serve Family Dinner Buffet-Style?

~it keeps food mess in the kitchen where I already need to clean up from making dinner

~I don’t have to carry food into our dining room

~I don’t have to set the table

~everyone is responsible for getting their own drink from the stack of cups

~there is no clearing the table, except for each person bringing their plate back into the kitchen when finished

~if we have to eat at different times as a family, the food is in the kitchen, ready to be reheated for whomever is arriving late

~it keeps condiments close to the refrigerator, easy to grab, set out & put away.

{super simple noodles & sauce dinner–with a very naked salad! Super simple is ok!}

Keeping Dinner Simple, Efficient & Beautiful

I’m all about keeping life simple and doing my best to live slow, but when it comes to getting dinner made and my people fed, I become all about fast, although still try to keep it simple. Really, efficient is a better word than fast, but I have become pretty fast at whipping up dinner!

There is certainly a time and place for making a great tablescape and slowly setting the table & presenting beautiful food for the ones you love; to pass & savor & enjoy. But I find during the busy teenage years, for most of our dinners, simple & efficient is good enough.

I do still love beauty when it comes to presentation, so even when setting food out buffet-style, I will light a candle and place my utensils in a mason jar, use pretty napkins & put a vase of live eucalyptus or dried flowers out. These are things I have set out anyway, so it really takes no effort at all, and as you can see from the above photo, I’m still not above serving food out of the pan & saving myself from having to do extra dishes. Even service from pans can be beautiful if served with love and a lit candle!

Doing Things In A Non-Traditional Way Is OK

Doing things in a non-traditional way is ok. Simple is ok. Breakfast for dinner is ok. Using prepared foods (like the pancake puffs above) is ok. Serving from the pan is ok. Apples don’t have to be in cooked in a beautiful cinnamon sauce, just sliced and bare is ok. If you don’t have time for salad toppings, serving naked greens is a-ok! Oftentimes, the more simple the food the more healthy it is. A bowl of berries for dessert instead of berry crisp is easier, more simple and more healthy! I still love my berry desserts but tend to save them for the weekends while keeping things pretty pure and simple during the week.

Living simply for me is often a letting go of what is perfect or what I think the standard should be, and just being ok with what is. Right now, what IS for our family right now is this…I’m running my girls around instead of making cinnamon caramel sauce for my apples, and that my friends, is ok!

FAMILY/ Featured/ Kids/Family

A Family Update

{photo taken by Jenna Spurlin}

I recently wrote a post titled My Journey From Hobby Blogger to Influencer, and talked about how this blog is my recipe binder, my memory keeper, my cancer journal & a place to connect with such a great and caring community. It has certainly become something very special to me and my family over the years. It is especially comforting as a 2-time cancer survivor that my words and our memories are in a place where my 3 girls could easily access them and know the things I think about and am passionate about.

This post is one that I am writing just to capture this season in life. I find myself with 3 teenage daughters and I wonder where the time has gone? When did this happen?

I don’t write as often about my girls now that they are teens. It is a delicate thing, letting their stories be THEIR stories & not oversharing. I will be doing a dance with this delicate sharing in some upcoming posts where I will write about a teen parenting class I have been taking. It has been so good and has really helped me embrace these years and realize just how wonderful they can be.

But for now, I’m just going to share these family photos with you and try to take a ‘word snapshot’ of my 3 lovlies and their sweet lives.

{photo taken by Jenna Spurlin}

………………..

Teagan

My firstborn. My overachiever. My hard worker. My heart. You can find her most nights leaning over textbooks with pens, pencils, a water bottle & snacks diligently studying. She is 16 & a sophomore in high school, is a cross-country runner, & is super involved as a leader in her youth group. She has always chosen great friends to hang out with & is wise beyond her years. She is very self-aware, knows her strengths and weaknesses, has a beautiful thinking brain, does not like a lot of emotional fluff, & finds humor in so many things. She usually has a smile on her face and I marvel how it rarely goes away…she has this amazing ability to smile even while talking. It is her default face and it is beautiful. I find myself trying to hang on to every moment, as I know we only have a couple of years left with our girl.

Colsie

She is my red-haired beauty & my hero at age 15. Life has given her some great obstacles the last few years but she has come through them with grit, perseverance and a resilience that I am just in awe of. She is incredibly creative and musical and has a love for instruments including the violin, guitar & piano. She has a soft heart that cares for others. She is very in tune with the emotions of others and will be the first to ask “are you ok?” when she senses something is wrong. She, too, has a wonderful friend group & is truly a great friend to others. I have always called her my creative, caring, kind, quirky Colsie & even as a teenager she still is all that! She will frown at that ‘quirky’ word, but I love that she is unique and delights in things that are not always mainstream. Case in point? She is going ‘hammocking’ with a friend after school today. She saved money to purchase this awesome portable hammock, (affiliate link) and she and her friends will just take their hammocks and ‘hang out.’ It cracks me up. They are also going to take some photos while at the park, as Colsie is a very gifted photographer.

Avery

Avery is 13 and in middle school. The strong will that we saw when she was young has chilled out into something so wonderful. She is the perfect balance of soft and strong. It is quite remarkable to watch. She is a very determined, gifted and self-motivated student, a great soccer player despite the challenges that having asthma brings, is a super talented baker & loves watching recorded tv with her Dad. She is not one who needs a ton of friends. She is a good friend to a select few, and truly just loves being at home with her family and ipod. She is a friendly introvert. She gets that beauty is fleeting, even at a young age, and I wonder if she knows how beautiful she really is? She is a bit of a tom-boy, but one who always has her nails polished with quite impressive DIY designs. She plays the piano & usually practices without needing a reminder. Avery loves one-on-one conversation and will often come sit on my bed in the evening just to talk, or will become quite chatty at the breakfast table each morning, which makes me smile. She lives for holidays, as they give her an excuse to bake something great or come up with awesome gifts for those she loves. She also values family, as her favorite place to be is at her Grandparents house, jumping on the trampoline with her cousins.

………………..

So there are my girls in a nutshell, at this stage in life. Notice there is much positive and no negative, which is not reflective of how it really is. Yes, there is so much beauty and positive, but there IS a reason I’m taking a teen parenting class! The teens years can be hard as kids are discovering who they are and parents are learning how they must parent differently, and how to let go. There are personality differences which can create much static and drama, especially with 3 girls! We are not the perfect family, so far from it…but I do feel like we are all learning how to love well & I know God will continue to show us how to do that, despite all of our differences & shortcomings. This is my daily prayer. We have come through a lot together & I celebrate that!

I have to mention my man before closing this family update.

My Todd.

Steadfast, loyal, loving, wise. He serves all of us ‘girls’ with humility & consistency. We all know we are his priority & that he would do anything for us. He spends his days working hard for our family and never complains. He is in full-time ministry and does work every day that is meaningful and makes a difference. He lives for family nights and junk food on the weekends, and the occasional date night with ME. I am a very, very blessed woman and I’m so thankful to call him mine!

………………

If you have made it to the end, then I must thank you for reading this. I am so very thankful for this space to record things that matter to me, and the fact that you come along with me in that means the world to me! Thanks for reading New Nostalgia!

……………….

What about you? Are you a parent to teens? What are you learning? Got any tips for me?

FAMILY/ Featured/ Leaving A Legacy/ Sponsored

My Journey From Hobby Blogger To Influencer

I started blogging back in 2009, with very little knowledge of what I would be getting myself into. My first post was titled “My Love Affair With Mason Jars” & it used a low resolution, pixelated image from my point-and-shoot camera, & was super short with no paragraphs. Let’s just say there was much room for improvement!

I was constantly sharing recipes and craft ideas with friends over email, so I decided I would just start blogging these ideas as a creative outlet and a way to easily share things with others.

HEAD TO TAPINLUENCE TO SEE MY FULL ARTICLE

Brands are searching for voices like yours. A TapInfluence profile is a great way to attract attention from top brands who are ready to harness the power of influencer marketing. To get started, create your free profile here.

This is a sponsored conversation written by me on behalf of TapInfluence, the leader in connecting influencers with opportunities to collaborate with brands.

Older Posts

Newer Posts