I have found a spiritual mentor in blogosphere. Her name is Ann Voskamp and her blog is called “Holy Experience.” I have talked about her here, and continue to be a huge fan. The way she writes and experiences God just hits a chord with me. I feel she is able to put on paper emotions, feelings and thoughts I have but can’t express. She expresses her heart beautifully, I just jive with her! I am so thankful to have found her and can learn from her.
I’ve been reading through her series of spiritual practices with an eye out for posts on prayer. She, of course, did not disappoint. She’s written much about prayer, but this post made my heart yearn for what she had. She wrote about creating a space in her home specifically for the act of prayer. I finished reading the post with a longing for one of my own. A day later, I have one.
We have a landing area upstairs that tends to be unused space. I walk through it numerous times a day to get to my bedroom. It is a favorite space of mine, because of the many windows that allow light to stream in. Yesterday it was full of Christmas bins waiting to be put into the attic. Today, it is an intentional meeting place with my God. I had some time there with Him today. It was peaceful and I felt great anticipation of precious time to come. I had just finished that time when I received an email from a friend whose family is experiencing the pain of cancer. I knew where I would go to kneel and ask God to give them peace, and back up the stairs I went. I know I can pray anywhere, anytime, but there is something special about having a place, an intentional place.
For me:
- It is a place that says “God, I want to meet with you”
- It is a place that allows me to stop and kneel for sixty seconds in the midst of busy life.
- It is a place that draws me to sit and stay, to meditate, journal, read and pray.
It is also place where others have been…
John Piper writes…
“…when we bought our first home, I built a prayer bench with a place for my elbows in a kneeling posture, and a place for my bible to lie, and a shelf underneath for the Bible or other books and a notepad… There the prayer bench welcomes me every morning and several times during the day. God alone knows the tears and songs that have mingled there. I urge you to think creatively.
Seriously consider building a place of prayer…”
I considered.
I found:
- A bench we have had sitting in our sunroom.
- A basket given to me by my mom for Christmas.
- A candle and matches.
- Books, Bible and journal.
- Pens and highlighter.
- Rocks that remind me to “remember the works of the Lord.”
- A pillow given to me from a friend.
And now I have a simple meeting place- A prayer bench.
This post is linked to:
Finer Things Friday @ The Finer Things In Life
Show And Tell Friday @ My Romantic House
I want meet with Him everyday.
I want to take on His strength.
I want to love what He loves.
I want this, because I know Him.
“God is not a belief to which you give your assent. God becomes a reality whom you know intimately, meet everyday, one whose strength becomes your strength, whose love, your love. Live this life of the presence of God long enough and when someone asks you, “Do you believe there is a God?” you may find yourself answering, “No, I do not believe there is a God. I know there is a God.”
~Ernest Boyer, Jr.
I got angry today. Quite angry, and hung out with it for quite awhile, most of the day, in fact.
I started the day out with great intentions, before I even got out of bed I was ready to embrace this day, and to be a mom full of love. Winter break is almost over and come Monday they will head back to school–already?
I started the day out with great intentions, before I even got out of bed I was ready to embrace this day, and to be a mom full of love. Winter break is almost over and come Monday they will head back to school–already?
My thoughts have been on how short this life is, and how quickly the years go by. God is so great to give us new seasons, new beginnings, new mercies and new years. At the beginning of this new day that God has granted, I was so full motivation and determination to embrace this beautiful gift of a day.
And then, the bickering began. Little voices full of selfishness, little hearts that did not want to share, little lives experiencing how fallen we are and how much we need help, need a Savior. Did I see them in this light, in that moment? No. Nada. Nope.
My own selfishness, my own unwillingness to share my time to teach, my own fallenness came so quickly, too quickly. I refused to admit my need for help, my need for a Savior. Instead, I listened to lies from self, telling me I deserved more, telling me I had reason for the self pity I was starting to drown in, telling me that I am alone. Then– I got angry, and then I got angry that I was angry, then I tried to blame others for my anger, and then I blamed myself. I went inward, I chose to entertain untruths, I shrunk under the fingers of self, pointing, accusing and harsh, and I had a crap day because of it.
Then, God showed me how amazingly merciful and full of grace He is.
He wrapped Himself around me through the words of a beautiful writer. Her post title caught my eye.
He wrapped Himself around me through the words of a beautiful writer. Her post title caught my eye.
“The Broken Beloved”
My name, Amy, means beloved. The title intrigued me. Today I felt broken..very broken, but not beloved. How do I so quickly forget this? How quickly do I forget that the breaks do not define me? How quickly do I forget that I know the Ultimate Healer?
You must click here and read the whole post. I loved the paragraph toward the end that answers the question, “How does a broken mother parent in a home of brokenness?“
I also loved this, and so relate to her thoughts:
I’ve tried to fix me, endlessly, oiled perfection slipping impossibly through these fingers. So it is: “I am like a broken vessel” (Ps. 31:12).
Nor can determined efforts completely repair the glaring cracks and chips of the damaged children and spouses who brush against the wounded self. I know that too. The bandages of manipulation, the splints of control, the casts of anger have healed little and hurt more. We live the pain of bruised souls pressed close.
I weary of it. This array of days broken, to various and sundry degrees, with sloth, squabbles and selfishness, inflicts its own pain.
Can’t we just be well and whole?And in the groans of our cumulative woundedness, comes the whisper, “You are my beloved. My Broken Beloved. My Beloved Broken.”
It’s all okay.
This brokenness. This cracked life. This damaged family. Yes, we are broken, but not discarded; cracked, but not rejected; damaged, but not junked. We are the broken. And yet we are, incomprehensibly, unfathomably,
the beloved.And this:
“And so a mother patterns her life after her Lord’s: she knows she is taken, chosen and called. Yes, she is the beloved, openly soaking in His blessings showered upon her. Yet she accepts her life as broken, cracked. So she gives, pouring out through the fractures, for she knows, painfully so, what it is to be broken.”
Isn’t her style of writing beautiful? I am so glad I found her, and I so glad truth found me through her words.
I am Broken. I am Beloved.
I am Broken. I am Beloved.
My cousin and dear friend, Keeli, gave me a really great Christmas gift. A book, (which I am sure I will end up writing about because it is GOOD) and a C.D by Meredith Andrews called “The Invitation.” I have listened and listened to it– every song is so good! She told me to listen to number 3, which is a song called “You’re Not Alone.” It is a powerful song full of words that I know to be true– No matter where we have been, what we have done, Jesus is there and He loves us. He longs to take our fears; He longs to take our pain and replace it with peace; He wipes away our tears and gives hope when it seems like there is none. He NEVER leaves, He is faithful and true…forever.
“I will never leave you or forsake you.” -Jesus
As a Christian, you are never ever totally alone (Romans 8:35-39). God is with you. This is the joy of Christmas, Emanuel — God with us (Matthew 1:23). He is with you. His Holy Spirit is with you (Ephesians 1:13-14). And not only with you but He lives IN you!
Do you know Him as your Lord and Saviour? Then take heart, for in Him you are safe (Jude 1); in Him you are secure (Romans 5:1-10); in Him you are saved (Ephesians 1:4-14); in Him you are forgiven (Hebrews 10:10-12); and in Him, even when you are weak you are strong – for His grace is sufficient for you (2 Corinthians 12:10).
The following is written by Steve Camp:
Though the world around us pridefully says, “God helps those who help themselves,” the reality is just the opposite. God helps those who can’t help themselves. Those that find themselves utterly destitute of confidence in their own abilities to deliver themselves from their calamity, pain, helplessness or hopelessness, and are ship-wrecked on His grace, cast-a-ways on His mercy; find a place of refuge with the Lord (Romans 5:8-10). He comes to the rescue to those who are void of their own strength and are completely bankrupt of their own competence to find their rest and assurance only in Him.
Here is the song and video of “You’re Not Alone” (scroll down for lyrics)
You’re Not Alone
I search for love
When the night came and it closed in
I was alone
but you found me where I was hiding
and now I’ll never ever be the same
It was the sweetest voice that called my name
saying
You’re not alone
for I am here
let me wipe away your every fear
My love I’ve never left your side
I have seen you through the darkest night
and I’m the one who’s loved you all your life
All of your life
You cry yourself to sleep
cause the hurt is real
and the pain cuts deep
All hope seems lost
With heartache your closest friend
and everyone else long gone
You’ve had to face the music on your own
but there is a sweeter song that calls you home
saying
You’re not alone
for I am here
let me wipe away your every tear
My love I’ve never left your side
I have seen you through the darkest nights
And I’m the one who’s loved you all your life
All your life
Faithful and true… Forever
For my love will carry you….
You’re not alone
for I… I am here
let me wipe away every fear… Oh yeah
My love I’ve never left your side
I have seen you through your darkest night
Your darkest night
And I’m the one who’s loved you all your life
All of your life
I don’t want to become complacent. I want to be purposeful in my thinking
this Christmas season. I don’t want to miss the amazing-ness of what it is
all about…God becoming a man, to live among us, so that we
might see His awesomeness!
Want to know more? Check out this video.
Still want to know more? Email me!!
MY NEW FAVORITE CHRISTMAS SONG!
James at Beneath the Cross posted this Christmas song on his blog, and it has been in my head ever since! (if you want to learn from one wise dude, go check out his site)
I had heard it before, but had not focused on all the words. I love the very last 3 lines, but my favorite line is “…you were born so I might live” The true meaning of Christmas in one line. Love it.
Lyrics
And with this Christmas wish is missed
The point I could convey
If only I could find the words to say to let You know how
much You’ve touched my life
much You’ve touched my life
Because here is where You’re finding me, in the exact same
place as New Year’s eve
place as New Year’s eve
And from a lack of my persistency
We’re less than half as close as I want to be
And the first time
That You opened Your eyes did You realize that You would be my Savior
And the first breath that left Your lips
Did You know that it would change this world forever
And so this Christmas I’ll compare the things I felt in prior years
To what this midnight made so clear
That You have come to meet me here
To look back and think that
This baby would one day save me
In the hope that what You did
That you were born so I might live
To look back and think that
This baby would one day save me
And I, I celebrate the day
That You were born to die
So I could one day pray for You to save my life